Sam I Am Blog

My Newspaper of News, Lifestyle,Culture

Posts Tagged ‘God

Warrior’s Welcome : Faithful 44

with one comment

Editor’s Prologue

January 25, 2015 — Philippines National Police Special Actions Force commanders enter the jungle to “Arrest” a suspected Islamic terrorist.  The PNP’s SAF commandos end up engaged in a firefight with “The Enemy.”

January 30, 2015 is declared “The National Day Of Mourning” to honor the memories of the brave men who engaged and fought the criminals and terrorists in the jungle.

I am a retired United States Air Force photojournalist and editor.  I am a pro-military writer.

Christy, my wife, is a Filipina.  My children, Samuel Ranilo Warren and Donna Junea Warren are Filipino-Americans.  My father, Samuel E. Warren served in The United States Army Signal Corps in the Philippines in World War II.  I was assigned to and served at Clark Air Base in the Republic Of The Philippines in the 1980s.

Needless to say, whenever anything happens in The United States or The Republic Of The Philippines, I and my family feel “Connected.”

I have been fortunate to meet and work with members of the Armed Forces Of The Philippines and The Philippines National Police.

I can understand and related to the grief of the families who lost loved ones in the combat in the jungle.

As a writer, I felt the best way I could express my condolences to the family members was to author a short story to celebrate the devotion, duty and dedication of the Philippines National Police Special Actions Force commandos.

Samuel E. Warren Jr.

One Warren Way

Barangay Baras, Republic Of The Philippines

Warriors Welcome: Faithful 44

FALLEN 44 Graphic e164b190-a820-11e4-b9c1-bf0dde9868b9_Screen-Shot-2015-01-30-at-9-32-29-AM

by Samuel E. Warren Jr.

Trumpets Of The Universe sound.  Planets in space reverberate. 

Comets and asteroids brighten for an instant and shimmer as the celestial symphony of sound passes them.

The solar bodies of stars glow with renewed radiation, which causes them to shine light Gold, Ruby and Lapis against The Eternal Charcoal Of The Universe.

For an instant, The Celestial Trumpets Sound and The Universe is a Crystal Of Courage And Compassion, which spreads throughout the infinite canvas of Eternal Night. 

Not a single scientific instrument on Earth or adrift in the Infinite Celestial Sea will record the miraculous music.

The Archangels and Angels, in their dress uniforms, stand in their positions, on both sides of The Red Carpet Corridor.

The Souls arrive at the end of the carpet and begin their measured step down the great corridor.

At the end of the red carpet is The Mystical Presence Of The Stranger.

The 44 Souls stroll the carpet past the formation of archangels and angels, who stand in Admiration and Respect.

The 44 Souls stop at about six feet away from The Mystical Presence Of The Stranger, which has the energy form of a human, but not the definition of flesh and form.

Before their eyes, the 44 watch The Transition.  The Stranger’s energy takes on a human form in a military dress uniform.

“Welcome To Valhalla !”

The words are spoken and emerge as English, Tagalog, Cebuano, and Waray.

The stranger smiles and nods.  “Call me, what you will, ‘ God’, ‘Mars’, ‘Ares’, ‘Thor’, I am your host for this ‘Welcome Reception.”

“You, Gentlemen, are ‘The Fallen 44 of the Philippines National Police Special Action Force’ we are assembled here, this evening. to salute, honor, witness and testify to your courage in battle.”

“You all perished in combat.  None of you made the conscious choice ‘To Die.’  All of you fought diligently and courageously to protect yourselves, your comrades-in-arms and to achieve your Mission.  No one in The Universe can question your courage and dedication.  You died in service to your country, your families and your fellow citizens.  There is No Greater Selfless Sacrifice In The Universe.”

“Tonight, this feast is to ‘Welcome You To Our Immortal Ranks.’  Tomorrow, you will witness from your positions here in Valhalla, ‘The National Day Of Mourning’ in the Republic Of The Philippines.  It will be a challenge for you.” 

“As Souls, you have your celestial bodies.  You retain the memories of Love for your families on Earth.  Grief, is difficult for humans to understand and express.  It will be difficult for you to watch your families grieve and it will be hard for you to accept and acknowledge the intense emotions.”

“Here, I have designed a way that you can welcome and accept the true emotions without you experiencing overwhelming grief for the families you have left behind.  Yes, your loved ones remain on Earth.”

“They are angry.  They are upset.  They are broken.  They are confused.  In time, they will understand your devotion and dedication to duty demonstrated your undying Love for them.  You sought to protect their Lives and an infinite number of lives around the globe by the successful execution of your Mission.  There was a definite valid reason for your sacrifice.”

“You, Gentlemen, are representative of what humankind was intended to be.  Caring, humane, selfless individuals who lived your lives in appreciation of each sunrise and helped other people on your journey through Life.”

“I salute you.  We salute you.  The Archangels and Angels Of The Universe salute you.  Gentlemen,  I welcome you to our ranks.”

“You, now, stand enshrined in eternity as “Heroes.” 

You out rank every prophet, saint, pope, ecumenical patriarch, archbishop, grand mufti, rabbi, ayatollah, imam, cleric, priest, preacher, or evangelist who has every lived, who lives or who will ever Live.”

“This is Warrior Heaven.  This is Warrior Paradise.  You ended your lives on Earth trying to protect and save the lives of others, there is No Greater Love.  You perished in a thought for your comrades-in-arms, your families, your country and your world.  No God, No Goddess, No Entity In All Of Creation could ‘Ask’ more of any mortal in The Universe.” 

“I Welcome You To Valhalla !”

God salutes the assembled 44, who stand at attention proud, but, slightly uncomfortable at the celestial pomp and circumstance.

The Archangels and Angels salute.

God smiles and nods.  “Gentelmen, the Valkyries, Amazons and Archangels stand ready to help you settle into your quarters at the conclusion of our formal dinner this evening.  Saint Michael and Saint Samuel will show you gentlemen to your seats at the head table.”

God winks.  “Tomorrow, will be a challenge for you, gentlemen.  Tonight, you dine and rest to witness tomorrow’s activities on Earth.

God smiles and gestures to The Official Reception Line.  “Gentlemen, this concludes my official welcome speech.  Here in the reception line are The Ancestral Comrades-In-Arms who are anxious to congratulate on your acceptance into our ranks at Valhalla.”

“I believe, many of you, gentlemen are familiar with the combat records and historic valor of your hosts this evening.  Allow me to introduce General Emilio Aquinaldo and General Paulino Santos of the Republic Of The Philippines and General Douglas MacArthur and General Mark Clark of the United States Of America.”

God smiles and steps back to allow the 44 Souls in their dress uniforms proceed to the reception line.

God proceeds to His Throne at The Command Table and raises his glass to the assembled heroes, “Gentlemen, I salute, ‘The Fallen 44’ !”  God renders a salute.

God raises his glass at the table and looks at all of the honored souls in uniform and into their eyes : “I welcome you into my presence.”

“I welcome you into Valhalla.  I hereby confirm your immortal rank, honor and glory and welcome you, as the risen ‘Faithful 44 ! ’”

The End

Philippines National Police Special Action Force National Day Of Morning Jan 30 2015 Image

Philippines National Police

http://pnp.gov.ph/portal/

Philippines National Police symbol 1017742_710715138969745_6654143956528279625_n

Philippine National Police — Quezon City — facebook

https://www.facebook.com/pnp.pio

Fallen 44 Links

Acting PNP chief: Retrieving, treating casualties in Maguindanao clash a priority

January 25, 2015 11:48pm

http://www.gmanetwork.com/news/story/416668/news/regions/acting-pnp-chief-retrieving-treating-casualties-in-maguindanao-clash-a-priority

At least 30 elite cops killed in clash with MILF

ABS-CBNnews.com

Posted at 01/25/2015 7:18 PM | Updated as of 01/25/2015 10:57 PM

http://www.abs-cbnnews.com/nation/01/25/15/govt-milf-report-casualties-rare-clash

Editor’s Epilogue

by Samuel E. Warren Jr.

I am not a religious man.

I do believe it is logical that there is an intelligence in The Universe beyond the understanding and comprehension of humans.

Thus, I tend to believe in “A Spiritual Intelligence” in The Universe.

In my mind and heart, I believe, “Heroes”, especially “Military Heroes” are always honored for their selfless dedication to their country and their fellow citizens.

I choose to believe “The Fallen 44“ have an immortal place of honor in the ranks of all the military warriors who have always served their nations and fellow citizens.

I salute “The Fallen 44“ as “The Faithful 44“

Samuel E. Warren Jr.

Written by samwarren55

February 8, 2015 at 1:58 PM

Posted in Uncategorized

Tagged with , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

24th Wedding Anniversary

with 2 comments

Editor’s Note — I wrote this editorial on my Wedding Anniversary for my wife. I had problems logging into my Word Press blog accounts on that day. Thus, the editorial stayed on my hard drive until I could get logged into publish the article.
Word Press seems to have updated their publish system, since my last editorial, so the format of this editorial may look different than previous posts.
Samuel E. Warren Jr.
_____________________________________________________

24th Wedding Anniversary

Today, Sunday, July 20, 2014, Christy Warren, my wife, celebrates her 24th Wedding Anniversary. Wait, a minute. . .my wife ? Holy Cow ! That means I’ve been married 24 years today also.

I need a minute.

Okay. The shock has passed.

I am surprised I am celebrating 24 years of marriage. I was a single man. I liked being a single man.
My first marriage was “Made In Hell.” Actually, I made the Supreme Mistake of walking down the alise of the neo-Gothic cathedral of The School Of The Ozarks at Point Lookout, Missouri, back in the late ’70s.

I made it a point to ‘Forget’ that so-called “Wedding Day.”

The Lesson Of My First Marriage was simple: I will Never, Ever get married again. Two-and-a-half miserable years of being “Locked” into “Holy Wedlock”, is the reason Why I Don’t Fear Hell. I spent everyday in Hell for two-and-a-half, long, miserable years. I dreaded sunrise each day.

Once my divorce was granted, I made myself “The Promise.”

The Promise was simple: “Never Again.”

At age 24, I won back my “Freedom.”

I never had any intention of ever getting married again.

I was “Free !” I was single, again.” I had a good job in the United States Air Force. Thanks to Uncle Sam, I do my job, salute smartly and I could travel the world. I did.

Again, I was a Single American. I was fortunately to be a Single American G.I. I loved my job in Public Affairs because I got to live my fantasy as “The Reporter.”

I lived to write. My mentor Master Sergeant took the time to really “Teach” me how to use a camera to take news photographs for the newspaper. I worked at it and became a photojournalist. I wrote the stories and shot the photos, which ended up in print in a base newspaper. My Life was complete. I was Whole. I was Happy.

The day came when Uncle Sam handed me a set of orders for duty in the Pacific. Hallelujah !

The Ozarks country boy ends up at Kadena Air Base, Okinawa. I had heard my father’s stories about World War II in the Pacific. I had heard other veterans War stories about duty in the Pacific. I did some interviews and published some of those stories. When Uncle Sam gave me the orders, I had my camera bag packed before my duffel bag and I was ready to catch the aircraft on the runway.

While stationed on Okinawa, I noticed and met some of the Most Beautiful Women On Planet Earth.

I met Koreans and Filipinas. I got a temporary duty assignment to the Kingdom Of Thailand, so I met beautiful Thais, Cambodian and Laotian women.

I was in my 20s and 30s, so I was as “Handsome” as I was ever going to be. Fortunately, the striking blue uniform and my Battle Dress Uniform made even an average looking guy like me appear like a handsome Hollywood heart throb.

Still, I had “No Intention Of Never, Ever Getting Married Again.”
At Clark Air Base, Republic of the Philippines, I fell in love with the tropical climate, the country, the base, and my job. I was a Single American G.I., whose blood flowed and his heart pounded, so I naturally noticed I was “Ground Zero” in the Pacific version of Heaven. Everywhere I looked — Filipinas.

A Single Man In Paradise surrounded by beautiful women realizes Life is more fun and meaningful when it is shared.

One Filipina caught my eye. Christy had a Farah Fawcett-Majors shag haircut. Her eyes sparkled. Her smile was diamond bright sunshine.

She wasn’t tall. Still, she caught my eye and I could see her as a “Playboy” or “Penthouse” centerfold in my mind.

Christy might have known two words in English. Language was definitely the barrier. I learned broken Tagalog and she busted through the barrier and learned English quickly.

One of the things I noticed about my future wife was her independence and sense of style. In the Asian culture, women usually are shy and taught to stay in the background. Christy was one of the few Asian women I had ever met, who did not do the cultural “Docile Routine.”

When it came to style, Christy had the eye of a fashion designer. She knew how to mix and match colors that caught my eye and made other men turn their heads.

We began to date. I suddenly realized, “Jackpot !”

I knew “If” I didn’t marry Christy I would always regret the decision. I wanted someone I could “Love” and share my Life with.

Women came and Women went. I was a single man. I knew, Christy was “The Woman!” I didn’t want to see her, “Go.”

I proposed.

She made me wait.

I kept at the job and wondered “If” she would take me up on my offer.

She did.

Friday, July 20, Nineteen Eighty Nine, the presses rolled. “The Philippine Flyer” came “Hot Off The Press !”

In the best tradition of American Newspaper Editors And Reporters, I had told Christy, “The newspaper comes first !”

My Wedding Day was scheduled to happen — after “The Philippine Flyer” came off the presses. Show Time was 10 a.m., at the Justice Of The Peace office at The Main Gate of Clark Air Base. I and everyone of my witnesses and people from my office were in position.

The only thing missing ? The Bride.

Christy was having “Second Thoughts.”

The clock ticks. Time passes.

I smiled a lot.

The smiles helped to hide my nervousness.
I remembered the stories about being “Left At The Altar.” I remembered Dustin Hoffman in the movie, “The Graduate.”

The witnesses were getting restless. The Justice Of The Peace did some more paperwork to pass the time.

I got restless.

At 1 p.m., my “Bride” walked through the door. Heaven retired an “Archangel” that day. Christy was a heavenly vision. She wore a simple white dress with the traditional Filipina “Imelda Marcos Filipina sleeves”, which rise an inch or two at the shoulder seam.

Filipina First Lady Imelda Marcos made the dress style internationally famous, so, at least, Military Americans got in the habit of describing the dress as “The Imelda Dress” or a Filipino dress with “Imelda sleeves.”

Christy wore her long hair up to create a bun at the back described as Chinese style. I describe her holding mechanism as “Chopsticks”, for lack of a better descriptive term.

Christy was “Perfect.”

24 Years Later — My Bride, Christy is still “Perfect.”

The only thing my bride lacked was “Wings.” I looked at her and my mind’s eye supplied the feathery, ivory angelic wings to match her dress.

“I do.” The two most important words I ever uttered in my life, I spoke that day.

When I die, I doubt I go to Heaven. I don’t care. I’m a redneck Texan. I grew up in the Hillbilly Ozarks. I am an arrogant American. I love my country and my flag.

The Texan Warrens and The Missouri Ozarks’ DeLongs taught me the most important thing in Life is to Live It and Love Your Family.

The Day I Step Out Of This Life and stand before God or Satan and am expected to make a statement about my life, I already know, what I will say:

“Sir, with all due respect, I enjoyed every second of my Life. I had the Best Mother any Son or Daughter could ever ask for.”

” I am grateful for my father. I hit the celestial jackpot of aunts and uncles when it came to DeLongs and Warrens. The Universe hit me hard at times in Life.”

“I am not a religious man. However, I got The Best Wife that any man, in the past, present or future, could ever imagine or ask for. Christy Saldana Warren might not have been an archangel, but, she has always been, My Goddess. My wife has always been my strength, my heart and my soul.”

“If this is Judgement Day; so be it ! I ain’t askin’ for ‘Squat.’ I just want The Universe, Yahweh, Jehovah, Allah, The Christian God and whatever other deities, real or imagined, which live in The Universe to realize I loved Christy Warren with my heart and blackened soul. I thank The Universe for my son, Samuel Ranilo Warren. I thank The Universe for my daughter, Donna Junea Warren.”

“My children have ‘The Best’ of their beautiful Filipina mother. I truly hope, my children have inherited some of the redneck arrogance, cynicism, skepticism, independence, stubbornness,and courage of their American Warren and DeLong ancestors and their ‘Hell-raising’ father, so they will achieve their own personal greatness in their lives.”

“Therefore, God, Satan, with all due respect,my Life is better than I could of ever hoped for. Faith, Hope, Beauty, Joy, Happiness — I had it all.”

“If you gentlemen dieties wanted me to suffer — you messed up ! I found ‘My Wife.’ I found ‘My Life.’ Christy Saldana Warren. I lived on the planet Earth. But, I Never really Lived until I woke up each morning and looked into Christy’s face.”

“My world. My Life. My Soul. I lived as a man. My wife completed me. No silly reward or No eternal punishment can ever separate my from The Love Of My Wife Christy On Earth.”

“Send Me To Heaven ! Send Me To Hell ! Cast My Atoms To The Far Reaches Of The Universe ! I will have the last smile. I had ‘The Best Mother Of Mankind.’ No Eternal Punishment Will Ever Torture My Sinner’s Soul because I had ‘The Best Wife Of Mankind’ — Christy Saldana Warren.”

In the United States, it is never easy to find the Love of another person.

In the Republic Of The Philippines, Love might be totally ignored because people are taught to believe in a God creature or his underling, rather than open their eyes and search for the soul that adds to or completes their Life.

My Life has taught me that Love is The Soul Who Completes You.

Christy has not always agreed with me. Christy, at times, has definitely disagreed with me. We have had our loud shouting matches at each other. However, I would never want to imagine My Life Without Her.

Thus, God or Satan — real or not — does not worry me. None of the deities of Mankind frighten me. Yahweh, Jehovah, Allah, The Christian God can all take a bus to Brooklyn and drown themselves in The Atlantic Ocean. I do not “NEED” or “WANT” any of the silly religious fantasies and mythologies of The World’s Old Tired Organized Religions.

I stood at “Ground Zero”, the day that Super Typhoon Yolanda, came to my barangay in the Philippines. I heard the winds howl. I saw the intense white light around the door frame. The door busts open three times. Three times I rushed put my shoulder to the door and closed it.

None of the phony Gods Of Mankind had ‘The Power’ to take me.

I love my wife and family. The phony Gods didn’t get me and they had their chance.

Super Typhoon Yolanda didn’t take me and I gave her three chances when I grabbed the door and shut it.

Thus, “If” I ever do stand before one of the false Gods Of Mankind or Satan, I will be respectful: I was born a Texan and “Respect” is ingrained in my DNA.

I will not “Fear” because I was raised in the Ozarks by a proud “hillbilly” mother, who taught me “Love IS Family” and “Family IS Always Love.” Relatives who betray you; aren’t family — they are just biological lifeforms who have a lot of the shared RNA and DNA.

Marriage can and does “Create A Special Mystical Strand Of RNA and DNA”, which flows through the blood and enhances the organs to evolve a human into a special, unique human, who lives for his or her family.

In the final analysis, I have, no doubt, I could look God or Satan in the eyes and present my final statements.

“My wife,Christy made me welcome each sunrise. Everyday with Christy was an adventure. We had our ups. We had our downs. We always had ‘The Love.’ Christy gave me two beautiful children, Samuel Ranilo Warren and Donna Junea Warren. The Universe knows ‘My Goddess’ is Christy Warren — my heart, my soul, and my Life.”

Thank You, Christy for 24 Wonderful Years Of Married Life. Thank You, Christy for 24 Years Of Life. Christy, You are “My Goddess.”

I love you, Christy.
Sam

Sam,God,Satan New Year Proposal by Samuel E. Warren Jr.

leave a comment »

 

Book Two

Sam,

God,

Satan,

The

New Year

Proposal

TICK TOCK TRAVEL TIME_resized

 

by Samuel E. Warren Jr.

God brought me to a Time and Space Dimension, outside the realm of The Real World.

 

God and Satan sometimes “Shoot The Breeze.”

 

Today, New Year’s Eve, God decided to select a human to attend the session.

 

It is obvious, that this brainstorming session is setting the stage for A New Year’s celebration unlike any other.

 

Satan did not like the location, so He teleported all of us to His penthouse in another dimension.

 

God in his white tuxedo seems to have a New Year’s Proposal in mind.

 

God crushes out his cigar butt in the ashtray and finishes off His brandy. He stands up.

 

Satan, Ole Buddy. You are just too serious. It is time to lighten up and party. I’m thinking a uniform change is in order,” teases God.

 

No !” Satan shrieks. “No ! I sense where you are going. The idea is not warranted and it certainly is not funny.’

 

God spread His legs into a Parade Rest stance and lifts up His head. A supreme ball of intense white light radiates from within His solar plexus.

 

Satan smirks, “His sense of humor will be the death of me one of these centuries.”

 

The rays of light cascade around God’s human form for a moment and then vanish.

 

Call me, ‘Goddess,” proclaims God, who now, stands embodied in the form of a tall, large redheaded woman in a floor-length eveining gown.

 

Satan shakes his head, “You just had to be a Momma’s Boy; didn’t you.”

 

An unseen force thrusts Satan back and He is on His knees on the floor staring up into a pillar of intense energetic blue light. “Alright. Alright. I get it.”

 

The light vanishes. Satan stands up in the stance that God had used. An intense orb of yellow, then, orange, then, blue light casts our rays around His body. “This isn’t funny,” he groans.

 

Satan drops to his knees and stretches out on the floor. The light radiates under Him against the floor for a moment and then vanishes.

 

A large, tall black woman lies on the floor in the place of Satan.

 

Goddess sashays over and looks down. “The process requires an intense amount of focused energy. If you don’t fight it; it is harmless. Poor Satan, all these centuries and sometimes He forgets to roll with the flow.

 

Satan slowly sits up. “Call Him, Santanna,” remarks God. God reaches down a hand.

 

A flustered Santanna rises to her feet. “i can do it. You and your silly little jokes and pranks.”

 

Goddess grins, “When I do it; it is jokes and pranks. When Satan does it, of course, it is procedure, rules, regulations, i.e., business.”

 

Why,” asks Santanna ?

 

In this dimension of Time And Space, we did The Universal Macho Male Bonding Exercise,” smiles God.

 

You guessed it, Santanna. Sam is a Momma’s Boy. In his Real World dimension, he can and does relate to a woman, whom he trusts, loves and respects. Santanna you are long overdue to feel some human emotion.”

 

Santanna looks down at the evening gown.

 

Goddess steps back and looks at Her evening gown. “Exquisite.”

 

She smiles at me. “Since I plucked this design out of your mind, Sam, you get to explain it.

 

Santanna moans, “Great. Time out for Fashion Week In The Mythic Zone.”

 

I know my terms won’t be fashion terms, but, I’ll try to explain the style and design. Goddess wear a full-length evening gown of satin blue.

 

The bodice is, essentially, a strapless bustier. It is an exaggerated M design to suggest the natural peaks and valleys of a woman’s breast.

 

The M provides two functions. First, it calls attention to the breasts. Second, it can provide a Public or a Privacy function.

 

If you wish to suggest, but not reveal, then, you choose the Superheroine Style that stiffly towers over the breasts and casts a shadow to conceal them.

 

Goddess wears “This is The Freedom Of The Press Style. “ The wearer has nothing to hide.

 

The large M cut design simply shields the breasts behind reinforced comfortable material. The design is suppose to gently lift the breasts and allow them to rest on a comfortable material shelf that feels as natural as if a woman is lifting up her own breasts.

 

To provide the support a woman’s breasts stand out like the prow of a ship. “The design to allow the breast to stick out forward is intentional. Men are men. Women are women. God purposely designed the bodies to be different.

 

The physique of a man’s body and the physique of a woman’s body should always be celebrated.

 

Under the breast is layers of cottonballs arranged to provide a cushion to allow the breasts to stick out forward and rest comfortably. It is the only idea I could come up with to replace an underwire. I’m sure someone in the industry can refine the design.

 

Santanna snickers, “We get it, Sam. You are a breast man.”

 

Goddesses frowns at Santanna.

 

I step out and gesture at the cup area of the evening gown. “If I knew more about synthetics, then, I might have been able to suggest a Kevlar, diamond, lycra or latex alloy or composition that would be sewn into the lining and really protect the breasts from injury.”

 

I point to the bodice. “The body of the garment is suppose to be comfortable because at a formal social fuction then you should look impressive and still be comfortable.”

 

My concern is the way the material is gathered together at the small of the back. I had hoped the overall design would allow for a more natural flow like how drapes hang straight down.”

 

It looks like some of the material may have been bunched and is creating an unnatural padding situation. Perhaps, a heavier weight of satin would provide the vertical flow, although sharkskin would probably be cheaper and maybe easier to work with.”

 

Regardless, I chose to embed two structural supports at the side of the garment to allow the bra section to remain suspended. When a woman puts her arm down to her side you do not see the support.

 

I believe with an evening gown a woman should have the matching gloves that extend half way up past the elbow.

 

I step to the back of Goddess. “The back is open to reveal the shoulder blades. I imagined this peaked V at the bottom of the bustier bodice, to allow the material to flow natually over the posterior.” I hunker down tto show how the material hangs down to the instep. “At least, the design rides to an inch or two above the instep.”

 

I look up and Santanna shakes Her head. “Sam, you really need to get out of the house more often.”

 

Goddess reaches down and help me to my feet. “Pay no attention, Sam. Some people and some entities are just wet blankets.”

 

Goddess winks and whispers. “I think you are on to something. You should sketch it out on paper and go from there.”

 

I shrug. “Basically, it was just a mental exercise. You see an actress at the Academy Awards on TV and you imagine designing her a more eye-catching andcomfotable gown.”

 

Santanna claps and steps forward. “I’m really going to be interested in how you explain this design.”

 

Like the previous evening gown, it draws attention to the woman’s breasts. It has the strapless M design.

 

The inverted W calls attention to without demanding attention. The red satin evening gown material flows down to full-length.

 

I etched in embroidery at the side seams of the bra to outline the front panel of the dress.

 

The gold embroidery suggests an Oriental flavor. I used oversized peal snaps at the seams to suggest a Western flavor.”

 

I open one of the snaps. “ The snaps work. They are in line from the armpit to the top of the hip. Two rows of three snaps are above the top of the hip to prevent the dress from accidentally coming apart in public.

 

This is my East Meets West Evening Gown.”

 

The front panel hangs down. The two inch wide Oriental design originates at the top of the hips from the bottom of the structural piping and flows down, along the bottom and up the other side.”

 

I step back and point at the thigh. “ The graduated slit of the evening gown allows the wearer seductive freedom of movement. Here, of course, Santanna has decided to go with black hose garters to Her nylons.”

 

Santanna steps forward thrust around Her shoulders and casts a seductive look over Her shoulder. “I have to hand it to you, preacher man, you really know how to design a comfortable evening gown.”

 

Then, Santanna winks, “You are going to have to pay attention to the shoes though. “

 

High heels may go with everything, but they are not always the comfortable footwear choice.”

 

I step back and look at Goddess and Santanna. “Thank you.”

 

For what,” smirks Santanna ?

 

It is always nice to see an image from your imagination in The Real World. . .or, at least, in a realistically virtual dimension.

 

Goddess smiles and steps back. She lifts up Her hair and it flows. She smiles into the ornate silver full-length mirror.

 

Roman women’s formal hairstyles were hard to beat. They did make every woman look like a goddess.” Goddesses’ hair finishes and a large silver ornamental comb appears at the back of the hairstyle.

 

Santanna smirks at Goddess. “The Punk Rocker, Spike and Mohawk look I take it are out for this evening gown.”

 

Fine.” Santanna firmly plants her feet on the floor and the scattered strands of hair rise to create a formal Korean hairstyle.

 

The large ornamental gold and jade dragon comb appears in the hair.

 

You know, professor, I think, I’m going to spend more time looking in on your mind.

 

I got a tall, busty, black bodybuilder physique out of your subconscious. The end result is I like how this dress hangs and swings on my body.”

 

Santanna don’t try to intimidate Sam. It is New Year’s Eve. We want to party. I think Sam is in the inner reflection mode.

 

Goddess gestures to me. I step up and take her hand. Santanna steps up and takes mine. “Relax, human. You ain’t my type.”

 

I step forward and the two buxom women in evening gowns stroll toward my front porch.

 

Goddess laughs. “Relax, Sam. You don’t have to worry about your neighbors. We are still doing the old spatial time displacement routine. We are at a level in your world, but we are still transparent.

 

Santanna staggers around on the heels and finally reaches the porch. Santanna takes off the heels and drops them on the porch.

 

The guests in the Real World look for the disembodied sound. Santanna smirks.

 


“Shoes, gentlemen. If we ever play this game again. We bring along a shoe designer.”

 

Santanna sits on a porch railing and begins to massage her feet. “My dogs hurt.”

 

Santanna roughly massages the bottoms of her feet. “Ouch,”

 

Santanna stands up and looks at the evening gown.

 

Well, if I have to be in this ridiculous skin wearing this ridiculous get up I really want to look like a woman. . .”

 

Santanna thrusts out her hip and places her hand on it. “Goddess is American 38G Cup,” Santanna proclaims and smiles.

 

Santanna’s breasts start to grow. “Santanna will be an American 40 G Cup,” Santanna proclaims.

 

Santanna swishes her hips and walks up behind me to breathe on my neck. Santanna whispers her best Mae West voice in my ear, “What do you think, big boy ?”

 

Goddess rises and walks forward. “Stand down, Santanna. If only the humans of earth could see The Ultimate Evil Of The Universe has gender issues. And, He, She still has trouble playing it off.”

 

Santanna nods. “Fine. Gender switch is an issue with me. Lilith will scatter my atoms across the universe if she sees me like this.”

 

God laughs. “You are immortal.”

 

And, Lilith is creative,”

 

God nods. I step forward and Pseudo Sam, the genetic golem, becomes a part of me.

 

I stand back in The Real World. I smell the food and notice the hunger in my stomach.

 

I sit down at the head of the table. Goddess stands to my right and places Her hand on my shoulder. Santanna stands to my left and places Her hand on my shoulder.

 

I express my Real World appetite. The Universal Energy flows in a circle inside me. I look at the porch railing in the distance and there is the momentary reflection of Goddess and Santanna standing by my side.

 

Once everyone finishes eating. The men move to an area to talk. The women sit at the table and talk. I step to the porch, look out into the night and light a cigarette,

 

I exhale the smoke.

 

Suddenly, my golem strolls toward the men.

 

Goddess, Santanna and I watch. “The TV is tuned to the New Year’s Eve countdown. The men are drinking tuba and the women are drinking wine.

 

Even without the spatial time dimension, I doubt anyone would notice us,” remarks Goddess,

 

Oh, no, Goddess. The way you look in that evening gown, you would definitely stand out, “I comment.

 

Goddess smiles. “This is New Year’s Eve. My wife is shopping somewhere in Paris for the evening and your wife, , ,” Goddess looks at Santanna.

 

She is at some party in Florence or Milan. She mentioned something about swinging by Greenwich Village or Haight Ashbury. I swear that goddess is lost without the 1960s.

 

We had better watch Lilith or She is going to gesture and re-create Woodstock right next to The Dome Of The Rock in The Holy Land,”

 

Goddess laughs. “Lilith isn’t the loose cannon, you think She is. You just get jealous whenever She negotiates a successful business deal that you overlooked. Bottom line, She has better control of her emotions than you do.”

 

Santanna leans against the porch railing and massages the bottom of Her feet, “I’m getting out of this ridiculous evening gown.”

 

You will do no such thing,” admonishes Goddess !

 

Relax,Satan ! Every millennium or so, we owe it to ourselves to do something unusual for New Year’s Eve. Who says we can’t put a little Halloween into New Year’s ?”

 

Santanna eases her right foot down on the porch, “I did like the feel of my tux.”

 

Goddess shakes her head. “You are not fooling anybody, Satan.”

 

While you have one presence here, I am aware that you are have your cloned presence suited up in a variety of tuxedos and dinner jackets and are in attendance at various New Year’s Eve Parties around the globe.”

 

Santanna grins. “The problem with being the Dark Half Of The Creator is I am the half, which means that you always know what I am up to.”

 

Goddess laughs. “Ah, the challenge of being a twin.”

 

Santanna slides off the railing and limps around in Her stocking feet. “With only a little time left until the New Year, I’m curious. If you aren’t going to pursue a career as a shoe designer in the New Year; do you have a direction?”

 

I nod. “Yes.”

 

Goddess smiles. “Speak your mind, Sam. Satan’s bark is often worse than His bite. He does have a talent for getting the right people to spread the word to enhance His “EVIL” reputation.”

 

Goddess smiles, “But, even with a reputation; sometimes you have to put your money where your mouth is. He usually comes up short on the follow through.”

 

Says you,” smirks Santanna.

 

Actually, I was going to give Satan credit for snakes, lawyers, Rap music, jocks and computer games,” I smile.

 

Goddess chuckles. Santanna bursts out in laughter and gestures. The porch lengthens and a round dining table with a lace table cloth appears.

 

Two bottles of champagne are in the silver chilled ice buckets standing by the table. A bucket of ice with tongs sits in the middle of the table.

 

Santanna grins at Goddess, “You might want to do your thing and slow time in The Real World. This sounds like fun.”

 

Goddess nods. I notice people in The Real World dimension, do seem to be moving slower.

 

We sit at the table. “I give you credit for snakes. A truly worthless lifeform that causes problems, spreads venom and kills numbers of people each year.”

 

Since the snake bite fatalities of a single incident don’t rank up there with bomb explosions; humanity at large doesn’t pay attention.”

 

Santanna nods. “They are worthless. I figured within a week, the slow-witted humans of old would have had them wiped out from the planet.

 

Of course, it only took one fool to look at a snake and decide it reminded him of a certain part of his anatomy.”

 

Santanna laughs. “There have always been stupid people in the world. But, for an ancient twit to look at an ugly snake and make that connection is the height of stupidity.

 

Of course, other slug-witted humans come along and the next thing you know, the nuisance creation genetic material is being plugged in as a symbol in stories and religious cults.”

 

Santanna hold up Her hand and the silver cigarette case appears. “Lawyers,” smirks Goddess. Santanna lights her cigarette and offers me one. I accept. I light the cigarette and exhale.

 

Lawyers,” I smile.

 

Granted. A lawyer does solve problems. The catch is when they solve a problem, often they are only setting things up to create more and bigger problems.

 

Humanity will never evolve to the point to where people can compromise, so, unfortunately, you will always need the occupation of a lawyer in humanity.”

 

Santanna grins, “Rap music is cuss words set to noise.”

 

I nod. “Simple. When it starts up, the promoters whine that once society rejected to rock and roll, jazz and other forms of music. No one wants to be guilty of stopping a valid art form, so suddenly you have rhythmic noise pulling down big bucks,” I decree.

 

Santanna leans across the table and looks me in the eye, “Jocks ?”

 

I lean across the table and look Santanna in the eye.

 

Pure Satanic Genius,” I grin.

 

The gladiators were true athletes, who used their brain and brawn to earn their freedom,” I point out. Santanna and Goddess nod.

 

I lean back in the chair and blow a smoke ring. “A jock is a man or woman, who never grows up. As a child, they are usually a bully or hang out with bullies.

 

They may make tons of money playing in public, but, they never really do anything for anyone other than themselves.

 

People buy into the whole silly fairy tale because it is suppose to be physical fitness.

 

Jocks are just supreme time wasters that drags along tons of people with them to waste their money and lives on primitive grunt and groan theatrics,” I explain.

 

Santanna laughs loudly and wipes at a tear in Her eye.

 

Goddess lights a cigarette. “Sam, why do you think Satan created computer games.”

 

I was yanking His chain,” I grin.

 

Computer games can be important to teach hand and eye coordination and to teach someone how to use a computer, the Internet and other tasks,” I explain.

 

A major downside of humanity is how quickly humanity can get addicted to something.

 

Whether a computer game is simple or complex, if the right person sits down in front of the screen, hours of their lives slip away wasted and unused.”

 

Everyone fights boredom. Computer games are a great way to fight it.”

 

When the entertainment becomes an obsession then it is a habit, which is an addiction, which is basically a way to waste large chunks of your life. Everything in moderation.” I smile.

 

Santanna laughs loudly. Goddess exhales smoke and grins. “I have a game for you.” Goddess winks. “If you were granted immortality and God status, what would you change ?”

 

World peace,” teases Santanna

 

I shake my head. “World Peace is a silly fantasy. No way to achieve it on an earth full of humans,” I retort.

 

Really,” inquires Santanna. “Do tell.”

 

God could wave His hand and walah, suddenly there would be Peace throughout the world.

 

Peace is boring. Everyone would deal with their happy, happy, joy,joy modes for a few hours, days, weeks, months. Humanity might even make it to a decade.”

 

Sooner or later, one person, a few people, or a group will get upset or disgruntled over something. Dissension Discontent, Disappointment, Discord. Disagreement.”

 

I shrug. “Whether it is one person, a few people or a group; once people don’t see eye to eye on an issue and they can’t reach an agreement, then, the stage is set for all that negative energy to grow and multiply.

 

World Peace is an unrealistic fantasy of humanity.”

 

Santanna lies back in the chair and points at Goddess. “If you did have immortality and God-like powers what would you do ?”

 

I smirk. “Grant my wife, immortality and God status.”

 

I inhale and exhale the smoke. “Then, I would convince Christy move to a distant planet in the universe. There we could try to enjoy our immortality.

 

Of course, once we got to the planet, we might give up the immortality to return to a mortal life. Life without end, never sounds as attractive in your senior years as it does in your youth.”

 

Santanna waves her cigarette. “Humanity. If you had to use your God powers for humanity what would you do ?

 

Honest,” I ask ?

 

Honest,” grins Santanna.

 

I look at Goddess. “I would thank God for the magnificent opportunity, but I would request not to be given The Power.”

 

Yeah, right,” smirks Santanna. “You have been offered The Power to be a God and you turn it down.”

 

I nod. “As a child, I was optimistic about humanity. I have lived in The Real World.

 

People don’t want to be “Holy.” People just want to live their lives.

 

People don’t even really care about “The Big Picture” issues of Life unless they think it will affect them.”

 

At Christmas, people go out of their way to help the homeless. Pick any day of the year before the Christmas season and people usually ignore or don’t think about the homeless.”

 

There are people, who can live their lives and still help others.”

 

You don’t know where to start,” grins Santanna ?

 

I wish I could be more optimistic about the human race,” I smile.

 

Unfortunately, in the Grand Scheme Of Gods, You, Satan have The Best Job. You get to put obstacles in front of people and challenge them to overcome them.”

 

I look at Goddess. “With all due respect, God has the worst job because He gives people the benefit of the doubt and tries to help them.

 

People usually only really drop to their knees to “worship”, during an extreme personal crisis. God always gets the short end of the stick.”

 

Santanna frowns. “You want my job ?”

 

No. It is obvious you, Satan, enjoy your job immensely.”

 

If I had The Power and could fly, teleport between dimensions, change the molecular structure of items just by thinking or wishing about them. . .obviously, all these aspects of The Power would be great to have.”

 

Imagine being a human with super hero powers. The catch is the universe expects you to use those powers to help your fellow humans.”

 

But, when you try to help one human, then, sometimes you cause problems for another human. It is a proverbial, endless loop cycle,”

 

The temptation, then, is to become just a selfish God intent on satisfying your own needs.

 

You can be human and be selfish; you don’t need God-like powers to be selfish,” I explain.

 

I shrug. “I want to live out my little,mortal Life and then go Permanent Change Of Station into The Afterlife.”

 

Goddess leans on the table and looks me in the eyes. “If you were offered The Power Of Creation And Immortality To Be A God; you would reject it ?”

 

I nod. “Yes.”

 

Where humanity is concerned. Evolution is a slow process. Earth is a classroom. People live and learn lessons. “

 

I doubt humanity will ever evolve anywhere near being “Holy” or a God-like status. It is too easy for humans to get sidetracked by trivial issues in The Real World.”

 

Santanna grins. “I have to hand it to you, human. It is rare, when I meet a human, who has actually examined their hopes and dreams.”

 

Goddess rises from the table and walks around the porch. Santanna watches.

 

Santanna looks around. “Retirement is nothing like you expected,” Santanna asks ?

 

Not in my wildest dreams,” I reply and open one of the cold bottles of rum.

 

Can I help,” offers Santanna ?

 

Probably not,” I grin.

 

Santanna snickers, “You’re still holding that Misawa Air Base thing against me; aren’t you ?”

 

I nod. “Until The Day Eternity Ends.”

 

Santanna shrugs. “Life is a slow pace in the country, huh ?”

 

I nod. “I’m not going to ask for your help, if that is what you are waiting for. I simply, don’t have any issues that require your level of expertise,” I smile.

 

Nothing,” whines Santanna ?

 

I sip the rum. “For the last year, it has been frustrated dealing with the electric company.

 

But, electric companies, internet service providers, cell phone companies, telephone companies, satellite companies – they are all alike. They give you ho-hum service and send you a huge bill each month.”

 

The electric company. Is that a request ?”

 

No. It is not a request,” I emphasize.

 

I understand the challenges the electric company faces. Weather, terrain, budget – I know all those issues play into the kind of service a company can provide. I get it.”

 

Nonetheless, every business in the world ends up with the dead weight employees, who get their game down pat. They don’t rock the boat and stay under the radar.

 

The dead weights go high enough to be comfortable, but, never high enough to be noticed. Then, they sit back and “Fat Cat” off the system. They collect a paycheck for the least amount of work possible.”

 

Santanna smiles, “You think one of the electric companies in Leyte has gone ‘Fat Cat’?”

 

I shrug. “As a human, I’m not impressed by their so-called service.”

 

I’m sure an Immortal, perhaps, a God, might have the opportunity to see behind the press releases.”

 

Santanna leans across the table and grins. “Are you sure this is not a request ?”

 

This is not a request,” I emphasize.

 

I am simply calling your attention to a matter that may have escape the attention of God and Satan.

 

I’m sure one of you or both of you might check out the matter when you have time on your schedule,” I explain.

 

Santanna sits up in the chair and sips Her liqueur, “Sam, do you think we will do any business in the coming year ?”

 

I shrug. “Anything is possible, I guess.” I reply.

 

Good enough,” grins Santanna.

 

Goddess returns and sits down at the table. “Remodeling ? Renovation ? What are you thinking,” asks Goddess ?

 

Inspiration,” I reply. “Once I am inspired I will move ahead with an idea.”

 

My wife, Christy is a pro-active person. She has an idea; she goes for it. My drawback is I stroll toward an idea. I don’t charge, head-first into it.

 

The last couple of years. I have tried to be a nice guy and be kind of laid back.”

 

In the New Year, I’m going to pursue the dream Christy and I want. I’m ready,” I proclaim.

 

Santanna holds up her hand and an open bottle of Benedictine brandy appears. A glass appears in her hand and She pours the liquid. “I like the irony.”

 

The story s that the Benedictine monks came up with the drink. The story isn’t true, but, it has been told so often that the brandy is associated with the monks,” Santanna teases and takes a swig.

 

A champagne flute appears in Goddess’ hand and She sips. “A few minutes until the New Year,”

 

A cold bottle of rum appears in my hand. I sip.

 

Goddess leans against me and whispers, “Remember, even in the tropics, there is a colds and flu season.”

 

Goddess steps forward and stands in front of me. She looks me in the eyes.

 

Your mother asks that I pass along her love,” smiles Goddess, who raises Her arms and an intense beam of light radiates from each palm into my body for about five minutes.

 

Santanna stands up and steps to the other side of the table. She uses her half-filled crystal glass to point at the TV screen. “The countdown to the New Year has started.”

 

I stand up. Goddess winks at me. “You will be okay.”

 

Everyone yells, “Happy New Year !”

 

I stand near the TV. Everyone is shouting, “Happy New Year !”

 

I embrace and kiss my wife, Christy.

 

I look up.

 

A cold shiver runs up my spine, I hear Santanna’s whispered smirk in my ear, “Go get ’em, country boy !”

 

A feeling of warmth causes me to turn and look at the porch entrance. The rest of the guests are laughing and talking and watching the TV coverage of the New Year being celebrated at the precise instant in various locations in the Philippines.

 

Santanna nods, smiles and fades into the dimension of Time and Space.

 

Goddess appears and smiles. “ Samuel, you are more ready than you realize for this year.”

 

I watch Goddess fade into the dimension of Time and Space and only a small dot of light remains.

 

Christy steps up to my side. “Look, a lightning bug.”

 

Happy New Year, honey.” I put my arm around her.

 

I watch the firefly flutter around past the banana plant.

 

The firefly flies further out into the yard into the night.

Sam

This work is licensed under a Creative Commons license.

Sam, God, Satan New Year’s Eve Analysis by Samuel E Warren Jr,

leave a comment »

Book One

Sam,

God,

Satan

New Year’s Eve Analysis

TICK TOCK TRAVEL TIME

 

by Samuel E. Warren Jr.

I hold the hot cup of coffee.

I take a deep drag of the cigarette and stare into the dense jungle vegetation in front of me.

I step out on to the porch.

Two bright globes of light appear on the horizon and transform into two human figures.

 

The first man to step out of the light is handsome, in his mid-20s, sports the physique of a bodybuilder. His parted sandy hair and cleft chin makes him a stereotype for a Hollywood leading man of the 1940s.

 

He wears a white double breasted tuxedo jacket. A pink carnation is visible on the lapel. The tied white satin tie compliments the collar of the formal shirt. The ruby studs in gold glow in the distance.

 

His white tuxedo trousers display the stripe along the out seam. His glossy, shined white western boot footwear I am certain is a message that he shares my fondness for the footwear – pointed toe and all.

 

I am surprised to notice he is wearing a white evening waistcoat over the formal shirt. The style of his tuxedo jacket, there is no need for the vest, other than, perhaps, personal choice.

 

I watch the jangle of the gold watch chain and realize the vest has a smaller buttonhole for the end of the watch fob. The tradition of the unbuttoned bottom button is maintained.

 

His broad smile has already arrived ahead of him. He strides confidently through the jungle vegetation through the porch.

 

The second man is less enthusiastic about his visit.

 

Combed jet black hair frames a handsome face. He shares the youth of the mid-20s and the bodybuilder physique. His evening attire displays his precise convention for tradition.

 

He wears a midnight blue tuxedo. The tied black bow tie is a conservative size to compliment and not compete with the collar of the shirt. His determined walk reveals that the painted on formal shirt is being held in place by shirt garters attached to his dress socks.

 

The shirt displays traces of movement, but maintains the painted on appearance, which means he is wearing shirt garters attached to his dress socks.

 

The buttoned tuxedo jacket gives only a hint of the cumber bun. The responsive rise and fall of the tuxedo trousers suggest the man is wearing formal suspenders beneath his coat.

 

His precise attention to detail makes the tuxedo seem painted on. The black onyx in silver studs of the formal shirt matches the cuff links. The gold wristwatch is worn to impress.

 

The white satin handkerchief peaked in the breast pocket is no surprise. The single rosebud boutonniere swaddled in baby’s breath is pinned on the lapel, which has no buttonhole. The boutonniere is strategically placed to attract the eyes of the ladies.

 

The highly polished black western boots means he was told to wear boots. His dubious look ripples toward the porch.

 

I put out my hand to the first man. “Welcome, God.”

 

Hey, Sam. Happy New Year’s Eve.”

 

Thank you, sir.”

 

I put out my hand to the second man, who gestures it away with his formal walking stick. He takes a step and his boot slides into the mud.

 

Welcome, Satan,” I reply.

 

He scowls at me and steps up on the porch. “This was not my idea. God said I should come with Him. You know me, I’m not fond of mortals.”

 

Any friend of God’s is a friend of mine,” I smile.

 

I didn’t say I was a friend of God. He just told me I should come with Him,” elaborates Satan.

 

I’m honored and surprised you gentlemen would show up here for New Year’s Eve.”

 

I will be leaving later, I’m sure,” sneers Satan.

 

God laughs. “You will have to forgive Satan His rude manners. The holidays always gets Him down.”

 

Coffee, soda, water, can I get you something to drink,” I ask ?

 

We’re fine,” smiles God. He looks around at the decorations on the porch. Satan hunkers down, grumbles and wipes the mud off his boot.

 

God sits on the porch railing and looks at me. “This isn’t what you signed up for is it, Samuel ?”

 

No, sir,” I answer, in my yellow short sleeve barong and denim jeans. “I had a Beverly Hills mansion on the Leyte beach in mind. Of course, with the fickleness of nature, I would probably only live there about a week before the ocean would swop in and wash it out to sea.” I smile. “You have taught me Life is always changing.”

 

Satan looks up and glances around. “One place is as good as another.”

 

Satan looks at God, “The evening is young and I’m ready to party.”

 

Cool your jets,” orders God. “You don’t have a hot date. You don’t even have a plan for the evening. Your biggest decision all day was in the selection of your wardrobe. Can’t you just be among mortals without always having an agenda ?”

 

I don’t know,” replies Satan. “I really have never tried. You know me, I’m the King Of Soap Operas.”

 

‘Asawa, taste this,” implores Christy, who holds up the steaming table spoon. “Umm. Good.”

 

Does it need salt, she asks ?

 

No, honey. The shrimp fried rice tastes fine.” I smile.

 

You, okay. I noticed you have been standing there awhile just staring out into the jungle,” she asks ?

 

I’m fine. New Year is coming. I’m thinking. Always thinking about new story ideas. It is a writer thing.” I smile. Christy heads back into the kitchen.

 

Obviously, Christy does not see God and Satan.

 

Writers and storytellers understand the multiverse concept that allows you to stand on your porch in The Real World and converse with entities in another dimension.

 

If you’re doing “The Taste Tester” routine,” Satan snickers, “forget ‘The Boys Night Out’ because Momma ain’t going to give you a Kitchen Pass.”

 

God smiles and gestures. My genetic golem stares back at me holding a hot cup of coffee and a burning cigarette. “Understudy time,” chuckles God. “He will do the things you do and say the things you say because he is a shade version of you designed to operate on The Real World level.”

 

God grins at me. “Congratulations. You’ve just been upgraded. You are now at a different vibrational frequency. You can see them, but they can’t see you.”

 

Am I in trouble,” I ask ?

 

God laughs, “Of course not, Satan and I know that if there is any place on earth that we can just chill out and shoot the breeze, chew the fat and just talk, it is where you live.”

 

I visit some people and they freak out. Satan visits people and they usually really freak out. We visit you and you are respectful and courteous. You don’t have the traditional preconceived notions of God and Satan. You give us the benefit of the doubt.”

 

You are a strange mortal,” quips Satan.

 

God nods at me. “Sam you have never learned the meaning of the term, “hold back.” If a question comes to mind, then, you ask it. If a comment comes to mind, then, you say it. You have the same approach with mortals and deities; except with us entities you add the courtesy titles into your comments and responses.”

 

Satan frowns and throws up his arm. Walls rise. A shiny hardwood floor appears under my feet. Two black plush sofas are arranged in a semi circle around a coffee table. A wall-sized big screen TV is on the wall at the end of the room. A gaudy, glassy, chrome, silver industrial theme fills the room. An outer wall becomes vertical sheets of glass.

 

Satan steps to the end of the room and a bar rises up around him. God looks at Satan.

 

What,” smirks Satan ? He grins and sits a glass pitcher on the counter. “Want a martini ?” He looks at the labels of the gin and vermouth bottles that appear.

 

Sam, I know you want a martini. I make them really dry,” He smiles.

I’ll wait,” I reply.

 

Satan shrugs. “Suit yourself. You guys are wasting a good new year’s eve.”

 

God sits on a sofa. He reaches inside his dinner jacket and takes out a pack of cigarettes. He lights one.

 

I light a cigarette.

 

I’m curious, Sam,” He smiles.

 

Sir ?”

 

The previous year have you thought about it,” He asks ?

 

I nod. “Everyday.”

 

Talk to me,” He offers. “Christy and I came back to the Philippines to be with her family. Her mom wanted her to keep the family together. My mom always told me family was everything.”

 

And,” God asks ?

 

Families change,” I shrug. “Times change. Over time, I guess the whole concept of family has changed. Humanity supposedly is in the process of evolving. I don’t mean to be a pessimist; but, I’m not sure humanity is evolving. I;m beginning to think, humanity is like a gerbil on an exercise wheel. We run in place and tell ourselves we are moving up the rungs of the ladder.”

 

Satan places his bulbous glass pitcher of martinis on the silver antique serving tray. The filled ice bucket, tall bottle of green olives, and a cocktail toothpick container. He places the tall, inverted pyramid martini glass on the tray. Then the carries the tray to the coffee table.

 

He pours a mixed martini into the glass. He uses the silver ice bucket tongs to plop two ice cubes into the liquid. He thrusts a cocktail toothpick into two olives and drops them in the martini. He raises the glass and smirks. “I love my martinis shaken. . .like my humans.”

 

Satan gets comfortable on the end of the sofa across from me. He sips His martini. “Mortal, I have a question for you.”

 

Sir ?”

 

I have watched you through the years. When God enters someone’s presence they usually tremble, go all weak at the knees, They never look Him in the face, Often, they drop down with their face in the dirt and their butts sticking up in the air, They start all their shrieking, groaning, crying, moaning, pleading, begging and theatrics. I enter the presence of humans and it is basically the same reaction plus I sense centuries of fear pouring from the pores of their bodies. “

 

God smiles at me, while Satan pauses in his narrative to sip His martini.

 

God enters your presence. I enter your presence. You do not act like the majority of the mortals. You look us in the eye. You offer us your hand. And, you welcome us. Why is that ?”

 

Respect, sir. I respect God. I respect You, Satan.”

 

Satan frowns. “Why don’t you tremble in Fear ?”

 

I smile. “With all due respect, sir, Daddy is a Texan. Momma is a Hillbilly. I was taught to respect people, not to fear them.”

 

God burst out in laughter. Satan scowls at me.

 

With all due respect, sir, the old prophets got it wrong. They preached “The Fear Of God.” You do not Love someone you Fear. Why would you want to Love someone you Fear ? Love and Respect should always be one and the same If you Respect, understand and admire someone, then, you should be capable of giving Love to that person or entity. If you have to Fear a person or entity then the person is not worth knowing and the entity is not worth worship.”

 

Satan shifts on the sofa and leans forward to look me in the eye.

 

You do not fear, me ?”

 

As a child, sir, I was taught to Fear You. The Global Mindset is You Fear Satan. As an older adult, I am Leery of you. You have your own agenda. I doubt it is in my best interest. However, while the World credits You with complete Evil, I realize an important scientific principle that if You were the complete entity of negative energy that You are suppose to be, then, You could not exist because that much negative energy would destroy itself. Your ultimate success would be your oblivion.”

God laughs loudly. “For the scientifically-challenged, Satan, Sam, is saying if your bark was really as bad as your bite, your own rabies would of killed you centuries ago.”

 

Satan whirls around and his face flashes anger to God. “I get it !”

 

He scowls back at me, “You should Fear me, mortal. A mere thought and your molecules are in the wind. You cease to exist”

 

I nod. “With respect, sir. You do not have to threaten me to destroy me. A mere thought and I am no more. If you have decided to destroy me, then, no amount of pleading, begging, protestations, oaths, prayers, whining, crying, groping, lying on the ground or crawling around on the ground will save me. Let us forget the Soap Opera theatrics and cut to the chase.”

 

Satan frowns, sips his martini. He eats his olives and sips His martini once more. He sits the glass on the coffee table. He unbuttons His tuxedo jacket, and leans back on the sofa with a smirk.

 

Sam, you are one arrogant human. The only reason I can appreciate, and even tolerate such mortal arrogance, is because it has been eons since I met a human, who did not cringe in fear the instant that I materialized in their presence.”

 

Satan removes His slender silver cigarette case from inside His jacket pocket. He takes a cigarette and offers me one. I take a cigarette. He takes the lighter from his pants pocket and lights His cigarette. He hands me the lighter. I light my cigarette and hand Him back His lighter that He places by His cigarette case.

 

He points His lit cigarette at me. “This is what I mean. A simple gesture. I offer you a cigarette and you accept. You have any idea through the ages, how many times I have offered a human a cigarette and they have turned me down ? The Fear of humans, their paranoia, their insecurity that is what enslaves people. They are prisoners of their own mind.

 

Granted, I always have my own agenda. Nonetheless, even Satan is capable of protocol, civility and manners. Anyone who is aware of my reputation realizes I don’t need a cigarette lighter to burst someone into flames. Nor, do I need Freon or Liquid Nitrogen to chill them into oblivion.” Satan smiles.

 

Satan,” God interrupts. “You were the One who said He didn’t want to talk religion, spirituality or business tonight.”

True,” Satan remarks. “I seldom find a ‘thinking mortal” to talk to. Most humans just regurgitate what has been preached at them since Day One their Lives began. This human actually tries to form thoughts to think for himself. It is rare to find a human that tries to use the brain God gives a human.”

 

I shrug. “I am, who I am, sir.”

 

God rises and crushes out his cigarette in the huge glass astray on the coffee table. In an instant, the ashes disappears and the glass sparkles once more. “You, gentlemen, talk.”

 

God steps back and unbuttons His white tuxedo. “Since Satan tends to like ritzy penthouses, I imagine this establishment,is at the very least, below us a five star hotel, which means there is a complete catering staff. Translation. I’m going to find a menu and call, Room Service. Can I order anyone else anything ?”

 

Satan turns and points at the back wall to the bar. “There is a menu on the counter.”

 

Satan pours himself another martini and offers me one. “No, thank you. I would appreciate some coffee, when it is convenient”

 

A silver serving tray of a hot pot of coffee, a creamer and a sugar bowl appear. Six plain white china coffee cups appear on their saucers. I pour a fresh cup of hot coffee. Satan settles back on the sofa with His fresh martini. He sips.

 

I take it, you do not believe the traditional human, global views of Satan.”

 

No, sir. The ideas are silly.” Satan laughs. “Please, explain. I am anxious to hear this,” He leans forward and lights a cigarette.

 

I light a cigarette. “First, sir. The old prophets meant well, but they tried to stack the deck in God’s favor. You are suppose to be God’s arch enemy. The old prophets claim that you are a fallen archangel. That can not be. An archangel, even the senior most ranking archangel of Heaven, would never have The Power to triumph over God. They stacked the deck in God’s favor.

 

Satan smirks. “You don’t think I could defeat God ?”

 

I smile. “What I believe is irrelevant. In order for You to be the Supreme Threat to God, You would have to be an entity, who shares the ability to acquire and use The Power Of The Universe. I have no doubt that You, sir, are more than capable.”

 

Then, why haven’t I,” teases Satan ?

 

Why would You ?” Satan smiles and leans forward to look me in the eye. “What would you have to gain ? Triumph. Victory. You win. Then, the work of rebuilding begins. You would have to institute some type of government and create a framework for the various segments of humanity. With all due respect, sir, Your area of expertise is negative energy; not positive energy. Even in Chaos there needs to be a level of Order or the anarchy and destruction becomes an endless loop of creation and destruction.”

 

Satan smiles widely and sips His martini. He leans back against the sofa and stretches out his arms. “You have it all figured out,” He asks ?

 

I shrug. “I have figured out what I needed to understand for my Life to make sense. An Eternal War is not only insane, but, silly because nothing would ever be achieved. The violence, pain and suffering would be never-ending. A Constant State Of War is Complete And Total Chaos because the process of creation and destruction is never-ending. It is a cycle with no beginning and no end. War. All War has to end, otherwise, War has no meaning and Peace has no meaning.”

 

Satan grins broadly. He stands up and removes His tuxedo jacket. He lies it on the back of the sofa and sits back down. He crouches over the coffee table. I sip my coffee.

 

I am intrigued, mortal. You reject that I am a senior-ranking archangel. You reject that I am the Ultimate Military Commander Of All The Evil Forces In The Universe. I sense you respect, but, don’t buy into the whole “Aristocratic” view, so you won’t be impressed by my titles of “Prince Of Darkness” and “Lord Of The Underworld.” Tell me, then, what or who do you think I am ?”

 

For the record, sir, you want me to express my ‘honest opinion’ and you will hear it out before you react ?”

 

Satan smirks. “Okay. I’ll let you have your say before I get upset and turn you to ash on the sofa.”

 

What or Who do you think I am ?”

 

I sip my coffee and sit the cup on the saucer.

With all due respect, sir, I believe, You are The Dark Side Of God.”

 

Satan grins and leans back on the sofa. “How did you arrive at that conclusion ?”

 

I lean across the coffee table. “The Ancient Art Of Common Sense, sir. Humanity states One God is the Ultimate Force Of Time, Space And Creation In The Universe. Humanity ignores the Duality Factor. One of Anything Can Always Be Divided Into Two. A Half Is Always A Part Of A Whole. Therefore, for God to be One, He also has to have a Duality within. To be Holy, all of the positive energy of God would have had to encounter all of the negative energy within God – His Dark Side.”

 

Satan grins. “And, walah ? God creates Satan.”

 

I smile. “I am a writer, sir. I would bring the story on down.”

 

Satan leans forward and smiles. “Then, by all means, please, do.”

 

God The Entity would have realized that He would have to ‘cast out” the negative energy. Thus, at the instant of Creation, God became positive and Satan became negative.”

 

And, The Eternal War Of Good And Evil Rages For All Eternity,” trumps Satan raising his glass and finishing off his martini. He sits the glass on the table.

 

You ain’t buying the old Good versus Evil routine; are you,” asks Satan ?

 

With respect, sir. No. You and God are Victims Of Your Own Success. Sodom and Gomorrah are prime examples. As the Supreme Positive Intellectual Energy Of The Universe there was no need for God to destroy the two cities. A gesture and the complete infrastructure of the cities would of changed. The government, the society everything within the walls would of changed and God could of simply Rained Down Thornless Roses on the population. People would have been dancing and singing in the streets.”

 

Freewill,” retorts Satan !

 

With respect, sir. Freewill is a cop-out. The lamest excuse of humanity. Freewill is mankind’s excuse to put God and Satan on the bench for all of humanity. Freewill is mankind’s excuse to justify stupid decisions and allow people to get away without accepting responsibility.

Freewill is a crock. Freewill is still a choice. A choice always comes with responsibility. Freewill is cowardice impersonating courage.

 

Freedom means a person makes a choice and realizes they have to accept the responsibility that comes with the choice.

 

Freewill is for fools. The world is full of fools.

 

God had the Freedom Of Choice to decide how to deal with Sodom and Gomorrah Had He choose to change all the minds of all the citizens into a positive frame of mind, He would of maintained “The Holy Perfection Concept.”

 

Satan laughs. “You believe because God went all Good Ole’ Boy on Sodom and Gomorrah, He destroyed His credibility and integrity ?”

 

No, sir. When God went “postal”, He proved that even God understands Revenge, Payback, Vengeance, and “Setting The Record Straight.” Plus, He gave the Dumb Dumb Doomsday Prophets Of Planet Earth Their Best Doom And Gloom Story. Every pessimistic prophet who comes along simply takes the Sodom and Gomorrah story to the extreme for the latest version of Armageddon, Apocalypse, The Four Horsemen, The Rapture, and any other end of the world tale they wish to tell.”

 

The glitch God made was that His decision to destroy Sodom and Gomorrah meant that He was capable of violence, which is almost always considered a negative act.

 

How could A Pure, Supreme, Perfect, Holy God Of The Universe carry out a negative act ?

 

Satan laughs, “You are on a roll, professor. Please, answer your own question.”

 

He could not, sir. Based on the strictest definitions of the words involved, there is no loophole that would apply. There can be only one explanation. For all the supreme positive perfection, at least, an iota of negative energy had to remain for God to be able to understand and relate to His negative side.

 

Satan laughs. He unbuttons his shirt collar and pours a fresh martini. He plops the ice and the olives in the glass. He grabs up the glass and crouches over the coffee table to look me in the eyes.

 

Hallelujah ! Preacher ! Bring it on home,” teases Satan. “Of course, in the New Testament, God has become more laid back. Your explanation will have to take that into account, reverend.”

 

I pick up my coffee cup and finish it and sit the empty cup on the saucer. I smile and sit back on the sofa. “I am a mere mortal.”

 

Satan laughs and shakes his head. “I’m not letting you off the hook that easy. I want to hear the rest of this story.”

 

I point at Satan’s cigarette case and he offers me one. With a lit cigarette, I exhale the smoke and smile.

 

If God has an iota of negative energy, sir.”

 

Satan leans across the coffee table. “Have I ever mentioned I do not appreciate writers who keep their readers in suspense ?”

 

No, sir.” I smile. “If God has an iota of negative energy, then, sir, You must have an iota of positive energy.”

 

Satan spills his drink on the table. He sits down the glass and rises. He walks behind the sofa. He frowns. He thrusts a finger into His chest.

 

Me ! The Supreme King Of Negativity ! Lord Of The Underworld ! The Oldest Evil The World Has Ever Known ! I ! You see that I have. . .an iota. . .of positive energy flowing through my Immortal Veins !

 

Satan turns, thrusts out His arm, opens His hand and a wide corridor of flame sprays forward. The floor length drapes over the monolithic vertical windows are incinerated in an instant. Then, a blast of cold air from his palm freezes and whisk away the ashes. He smirks. “I really did like those drapes.”

 

He puts His hands on His hips and scowls at me. “I am The Bad Guy !”

 

Yes, sir. I did not mean to offend or infer anything else,” I explain.

 

Satan sits back down and sips His martini. He puts the olives between His teeth and gnashes down.

 

In Your world view, God is the positive energy. I am the negative energy. Since you reject the traditional view of your fellow humans in my role. What is the role You cast for Me ?”

You are, sir, The Businessman. You realize humans don’t get out of bed, in the morning, without a reason. You gave them a reason; they work or they starve to death. No one likes the feeling of hunger.

 

Satan laughs. “You see me as a businessman.”

 

The Businessman, sir. The world is and always has been full of insane evil. Horrific acts that are executed without any logic or rationale. You can attribute the insane evil to demons, denizens of Hell or just really sick humans, who have their own warped worldview.

 

Evil or Negative Acts With A Universal Purpose, I attribute to You, sir. If you were simply interested in violence, then, Chaos would be never-ending. Your Evil always serves a purpose. You are not the type of impulsive entity that waste time, energy and effort to satisfy a short-term gratification.”

 

Satan rises and brushes the lint of His tuxedo pants. He looks at me and smiles.

 

Samuel. You are dangerous. You think for yourself. You don’t ‘conform to the norm’ unless you have a reason. Right or wrong, you choose to use the brain God gave you.”

 

God strolls back into the penthouse, wearing a white buttoned single breasted tuxedo with his matching western boots. Satan snickers. “You ran into your wife, I can tell by the wardrobe change. She didn’t like what you was wearing.”

 

God smirks and steps aside. A large rectangular table appears. The pristine silver serving trays in the center contains a cornucopia of various and delicious delicacies. “Supper time,” smiles God, seating Himself at the head of the table. Satan sits to God’s right. I sit on God’s left.

 

It all looks delicious,” I remark. “But, Christy is cooking supper.”

 

God nods. “Understood, Sam. You will have an appetite in that dimension. Here, you need to eat to keep up your strength. Let’s bypass the science lesson and go straight to the aesthetics and philosophy. Think of the food on this table as ‘Food For Thought’ and ‘Food For The Imagination” and “Food For The Soul.”

 

Angelic waiters and waitresses, in their uniforms appear, and begin to place plates of food, in front of us. “Bon Ape-tit,” chimes God.

 

Satan smiles. “God, your mortal, Samuel, here, has some real interesting ideas about religion, humanity and your lifeforms on planet earth.”

 

God nods. “I am completely aware of Sam’s ideas.”

 

God smiles at me and looks at Satan. “You know as well as I anytime we are on earth, we are usually expected to play by the old ideas, rules, concepts and mythologies. When I get bored, I swing by Sam’s dorm room, barracks room or house.”

 

Satan smirks. “All these years and you haven’t been able to change His Freewill ?”

 

God grins at Satan. “He is a human, who has the Freedom Of Choice.”

 

God dabs the napkin at the corner of His mouth. “Satan, why would you complain ? He gave you a Portfolio Personality. He attributes Method To Your Madness. Most people just view you as a global infection of insanity that sweeps humanity.”

 

Satan nods. “My style usually doesn’t go unnoticed and therefore unappreciated.”

 

Satan sit back in the chair. “He is humanizing us.”

 

Don’t be silly,” God remarks. “Sam explains us in human form, but, we retain all our powers.”

 

God looks at me. “Forgive, my manners, Sam. I am putting words in your mouth.”

 

It is fine, sir. What you said is true. Humanity fears what it can not or will not try to understand. When God or Satan is thought of as a universal mist in an unreachable dimension, then, people, when they do worship, only worship out of fear and not respect.”

 

Ah,” smirks Satan. “You wish to bring back The Old Pagan Gods And Goddesses ?”

 

I finish chewing my bite of food and smile up at Satan. “Not without, a shave, a haircut, and a complete entourage of human professionals to assist them in everything from fashion to child-rearing.”

 

Satan frowns. “Why do you find the Old Gods and Goddesses so interesting ?”

 

I dab the napkin to my lips. “They were engaged. They were on the ground, They were in country. They worked with their citizens. They inspired their citizens. They gave their citizens faith, hope, inspiration, purpose, ambition, drive and the initiative to work for better lives in The Real World and beyond.”

 

Satan shrugs. “Modern religion does the same.”

 

God laughs and smiles at Satan. “You have opened a can of worms.”

 

With all due respect, sir, No. The One God deity is a couch potato watching the wide screen TV of the universe. The Soap Opera lives of humans are in a distant dimension. Humanity is a never-ending Reality TV broadcast that God allows because if He ever clicks off the remote.”

 

Well,” asks Satan ? I dab the napkin to my mouth.

 

God would simply have to begin The Creation Process Of Earth or an Earth-like planet all over again. You both like to watch the humans. Humans love to live. Earth allows the humans the opportunity to try and relate to and identify with The Creator.”

 

God scoots back his chair and rises from the table. He reaches inside His tuxedo jacket and takes out a cigar. He smiles at Satan and uses the cigar cutter to nip off the end.

 

Relax. Your wife went with my wife. They are doing the New Year’s Eve party circuit,” smiles God.

 

Satan frowns as God lights his cigar and puts the lighter back in His pocket. God blows at the embers in the cigar. “Satan, You keep frowning like that and you will have all kinds of wrinkles on your horns.”

 

I rise from the table and God offers me a cigar that I accept and light. We retire back to the living room.

 

Satan approaches with a cigar and snaps his fingers to light it. “Centuries Of Immortality and The Lord Of Darkness is still doing kid’s party tricks.”

 

Satan smirks. “If you got it; flaunt it.”

God blows a smoke ring. “Incidentally, Lilith said to remind you to behave.”

 

Right,” sneers Satan. “Like she is going to go out tonight and be so responsible. “ Satan puffs on his cigar and looks at the images passing on the TV.

 

He gestures with His cigar. “If we are going to do The Real World New Year’s Eve Party, we probably should get back to that dimension.

 

No rush,” smiles God. “There is plenty of time. We have put the old year to bed.”

 

God grins, “Now, let’s move forward with our plans to welcome in the New Year.”

 

Could we, maybe, speed it up to have the celebration sometime this century,” smirks Satan ?

 

Relax, Satan,” God remarks. A gold pocket watch appears in his hand. He opens it and shows us the hands point to nine pm.

 

I have this Time thing down to a fine art and science,” smiles God.

 

Satan looks at me.

 

If God said there is plenty of time; who am I to question God,” I smile.

TICK TOCK TRAVEL TIME THUMBNAIL

Sam

This work is licensed under a Creative Commons license.

Fast Christmas Coronation by Samuel E. Warren Jr.

with 2 comments

Personal Business Editorial

Fast

Christmas

Coronation

 

by Samuel E. Warren Jr.

When, my wife, Christy Warren and I first returned to the Philippines the exuberance and the pomp and circumstance ranked up there in the old black and white news reels with the Coronation Of Queen Elizabeth.

 

Christy was returning to her native Leyte and the pomp and circumstance had all the trimmings of The Royal Wedding of Prince Charles and Princess Dianna.

 

CHRISTMAS STAR THUMBNAIL LOGOI stood at the airport in Manila and for the briefest instant expected to see a royal carriage pulled by white horses trotting up the taxi lane in front of the airport .

 

We were both anxious to get to our final destination of the island of Leyte. However, family members were intent on their “meet and greet” ceremonies in Manila.

 

Then, of course, our royal itinerary had changed to add an unofficial “Goodwill Visit To Angeles City.”

 

Queen Christy Warren, Her Royal Majesty, was being treated to all the honors and accolades that she deserved. Prince Samuel of The Ozarks and The Duke Of East Texas was smiling and doing “the wave.”

 

The only thing missing from the royal entourage was The Official Press Corps. In the back of my mind, I knew the royal budget had the letter W associated with it and the name would not be Windsor.

 

The Strange American

 

On the ground, in Leyte, the procession of “Well-Wishers” came with the exuberance of visitors to Buckingham Palace for an “audience” with “Queen Christy” and a chance to see “The Strange American.”

 

Is he taller or shorter than General MacArthur ?”

 

He’s a Texan, right ?”

 

Where is Missouri ?”

 

What is the Ozarks ?”

 

Hillbilly is that a religion or a political party in the US ?”

 

 

Between Tagalog, Waray and English, I would hear strange questions whispered about me. Maybe, I should of cared, but, as long as they were the old, “Who is this guy ? ” question, then, I just smiled it off.

 

By January, it was obvious that most of the attendees at the mythical Christmas Coronation weren’t family members grateful that Christy had returned home.

 

The name Warren had proven not to be the name Windsor and no one from the “palace household” followed up on the holiday requests.

 

The Warrens Of The Ozarks had no serious intent to become Lloyd s Of London and the domestic policy issues involved The Saldana Family. Christy had come home to be with her family.

 

Any community initiatives and ongoing economic development that concerned the Warren Family in Barangay Baras would have to involve the overall Saldana Family.

 

Local people seemed to have had envisioned a British Monarchy arrival, but, the reality is the family approach was more a Joseph Kennedy Hyannis Port, Massachusetts Family approach.

 

Blood And Biology”

 

A person is more than his DNA, RNA, chromosomes and biological compounds. The members of a family are more than people who share “Blood And Biology” traits.

 

Saint Samuel’s Basilica

 

I have always been interested in heraldry,chivalry and genealogy, but, for the Christmas 2011 celebration, there were just too many people at Saint Samuel’s Basilica.

 

We didn’t have the pilgrims in the square awaiting the annual Christmas message, we had people who rushed through the jungle courtyard of Saint Samuel’s Basilica to seek an audience with Christy. I assumed the role of the concerned cardinal.

 

Cardinal Samuel nodded a lot and smiled a lot. But, I was interested to see were the well wishers and “faithful” were headed in their Christmas interpretations I looked forward to December 26, 2011. I wanted to know if “The Spirit Of Goodwill” was “The Real Deal” or just “Christmas Cheer.”

 

As the new year of 2012 approached, it became clear Saint Samuel’s Basilica would have to accept a more secular and business approach. Relatives were leaving and the shift in the idea of “family” day to day was becoming more like Missouri weather – changeable.

 

One Warren Way

 

By March 2012, it had become obvious that the Christmas Season was past and One Warren Way was a private home with it’s own “family” agenda. The opportunists went somewhere else. The family wannabe lobbyists had made their travel arrangements to return to other destinations in the Philippines.

 

In April 2012, Christy opened her CSW Cafe and got her dream to own and operate her own cafe. She provides good food to the community at a decent price. She became a business woman, who provided jobs.

 

Family members were offered the opportunity to work in her cafe. A few to date have accepted to work with Christy and her dream. Some did not.

 

By the Warren Fiscal Year of October 1, 2011, God was still in his Heaven, Sam and Christy were headquartered at One Warren Way with “Family.”

 

Holiday Historian

 

The Government of the Philippines dealt with their daily challenges of 2012, The Government of the United States tried to deal with international business and the carry on the traditional “Presidential Campaign” fiesta of every four years.

 

The major entertainment of any democracy relies on the Presidential or Prime Ministerial Election. The Warren and Saldana Family of Leyte settled down to the day to day business of life in Barangay Baras.

 

I have had a lifelong interest in all types of history. I got enough college hours under the belt to know how to do the data collection, compilation and analysis routine to examine an issue from all angles. I had collected the data from Christmas Day 2011 and examined the photographs I had taken.

 

I had enough data to take on the role of “Holiday Historian” and render a verdict on Christmas Day 2011 and the irony is the Christmas Season of 2012 provided the hours to complete the task.

 

Home For The Holidays

 

By October 1, 2012, I looked forward to my birthday, October 30, Halloween, October 31 and the end of 2012.

 

Christy looked forward to Christmas, December 25, 2012 and the New Year of 2013.

 

Christy decided to close the CSW Cafe for the Christmas Season of 2012 to spend some time at “Home For The Holidays.”

 

A year has passed, since we returned to the Philippine Islands. I have had time to reflect and look at The Fast Christmas of 2011. The photographer’s habit of having a camera growing out of the end of your hand provided valuable snapshots of time throughout the previous year.

 

Fast Christmas Fiscal Fiasco

 

The Life Learning Lesson of Fast Christmas 2011 is simple: people are people. We all have our good points and our bad points. Human nature goes beyond flags, passports and visas.

 

Some people will take advantage of you, regardless, what day of the year it is. In a perfect world, you would always be able to count on “Family.” The world is not perfect and some family members do not see “The Big Picture.”

 

In the early 21st Century, the “Fast Food” and “Fad” psychology of “Instant This,” “Instant That” and the evolving technology of “Upgrades” and “Real Time” has convinced people to focus on the “Short Haul” to try and plan for their lives. The end result is “people live from payday to payday without a plan to reach a comfortable retirement.”

 

To some people Christmas is simply another day to try and rip people off. To some people, “Family” is simply a six letter word in an English dictionary. To some people Christmas is just a holiday to be used to try and set up “pie-in-the-sky” business deals.

 

Fast Christmas had not been about Christmas at all.

Fast Christmas was various attempts to use Christmas Day 2011 to setup a mood of trust by friends, acquaintances and some family members.  Then, in 2012 the trust could be called upon to support series of changing, financial ventures to profit a few people.  Human nature being human nature some people will try to point the finger and try to make you feel “guilty” to get their way.

 

Some friends and family members had their own ideas about what Christy and I could do to help them. But, they didn’t have any ideas that would benefit the entire family or the surrounding communities as a whole. The “flash in the pan” business brainstorms didn’t work because my wife “The Boss” is a business woman, who always considers “The Big Picture.” 

Christy’s husband, “Sam the Cynic” needs to be able to visualize a “Real World” result.  I have an imagination.  However, I grew up in Missouri and you have got to “Show Me.” Unless I see three or four colts galloping in the field, I’m not going to invest in a “Unicorn Farm”, I don’t care how good the presentation is.

 

 

 

Mentor Mothers

 

Nenita Quezon Saldana told her daughter, Christy, “Keep The Family Together.” Opal M. DeLong Warren told her son, Samuel, “Family Is Everything.” Both mothers were right about their beliefs in family. Both mothers, knew their daughter and son would understand the changing nature of “Family” and “Business.”

 

To me Christmas is about watching kids have fun with their toys, brothers, sisters, cousins and to be able to set down to a table of delicious food and drink and feast like Henry the VIII, my favorite English king.

Henry knew, “How To Party Down !”

 

Other family members are welcome to apply their own meanings to Christmas to celebrate the holiday in a manner of their own choosing.

 

Fiscal Christmas Of 2011

 

Christmas Day 2011, I lean back in the chair at the table and loosen two notches on my brown leather western belt. “That hit the spot. Wonder what kind of feast Cousin Donna cooked this year back in Missouri,” I said aloud to Christy’s Cousin Romel sitting across the table from me.

 

Christmas Eve 2012, I put away the “Demonyo Itlog” – deviled eggs – macaroni salad, potato salad, rice, and enjoyed Mississippi Mud chocolate candy with my coffee. The women cleared away the table and sit down to a bottle of Christy’s red wine and the Philippines’ “Tuba”, coconut wine.

 

The men after dinner adjourned to the area by the Christmas Tree to enjoy Tuba and an evening of conversation.

A glance at Christy’s cell phone revealed an absence of “Blood and biology family” Christmas wishes for the holiday, which confirmed what I suspected that “Fast Christmas of 2011” was really “Fiscal Christmas of 2011.”

 

 

 

A Yuletide Toast To Henry VIII

 

I sit down with the men to celebrate Christmas Eve 2012 and loosen the waist of my walking shorts. I grin at Ramon, “I bet Cousin Donna has started cooking Christmas Dinner in the States. She always starts a couple days ahead of time, And, when I start to chow down on the hot biscuits she serves, I have to remind myself to leave room for pie.”

 

Kuya Sam, Merry Christmas.”

 

Merry Christmas, Ramon.”

 

I raise my tall coffee cup, “Merry Christmas to Henry the VIII,” I grin.

 

Henry the VIII, Kuya Sam ?”

 

I laugh.”Long story, Ramon. One of my favorite English kings, who knew how to enjoy a great meal and good conversation.”

Sam

This work is licensed under a Creative Commons license.

Written by samwarren55

December 29, 2012 at 7:27 AM

Posted in Bloggers, Blogs, Business, Current Events, Editorial, Family, Holidays, Money, Observances, Opinion, Philippines

Tagged with , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

The World Is Still Here Doomsday Editorial by Samuel E.Warren Jr.

with 2 comments

The Mayans Got It Wrong

 

The

World

Is

Still

Here !

THE GLOBE_resized

Ho- Hum !

The Globe Spins On !

Today is December 21, 2012. Alas, the sun will shine December 22, 2012. Grandparents and parents you will still have to “pay off” those Christmas purchases; “Newsflash” – The World Didn’t End ! All the religious brouhaha could have been avoided and global paranoia settled by the realization that the Mayans had a reputation as serious astrologers like the Babylonians. Using their calendar and almanac system they computed “The End Of Their Astrological Age”, which they may have gotten right. But, global society seems to have an “End Of The World Fetish”, so people hunkered down for another silly “Doomsday Prophecy.” Someone tell the groundhogs they can come out of their holes, now.

Photo by Samuel E. Warren Jr.

by Samuel E. Warren Jr.

 

Today is Friday, December 21, 2012. The time is 4:57 p.m.

 

Today is suppose to be, “The Last Day Of Planet Earth.”

 

Today is suppose to be, “The End Of Days.”

 

The Mayans got the end of the world prediction wrong. Obviously.

 

The end of the world for the Mayans came a long time ago.

 

Missing Mayans

 

Scientists,archaeologists and historians are still trying to figure out the day the Mayans vaporized into mist.

 

They may have simply stepped into their space ships and punched up the engines to fly away.

 

They could of activated a talisman or amulet and stepped into a time and space wormhole to travel to another Earth Class planet across the cosmos. They forgot to leave a note saying, “We will be back. Feed the cat.”

 

They may have gotten a really bad case of “food poisoning” and all dropped dead overnight.

 

Of course, the Mayans ingrained ecology consciousness kicked in as they died and their biodegradable enzymes activated and they became “dust in the wind.”

 

The “End Of Days for the Mayans happened a long time before December 21, 2012 – so, “the Mayans got it wrong.”

 

The world is still here.

 

It is now, 6:16 pm and the sky hasn’t burst into flames. Huge chunks of rock aren’t flying up into the sky. The earth ain’t opening up into huge cracks. Raging, roaring rivers of water aren’t emerging out to the sides of coconut trees.

 

The Dumb, Dumb Doomsday Dudes” got it wrong again !

 

Earth’s Favorite Con Game

 

A Doomsday Prophet has to be the best job on the planet:

 

You tell the fairy tale. People throw tons of money at you. Businesses sprang up overnight to cater to the global paranoia.

 

Once the date passes, the prophet shrugs it off and says, “Back to the drawing board.”

 

Smart Old Dudes

 

The ancient doomsday prophets were smarter than their modern counterparts. The ancient guys and gals picked a date far enough out in the future that they would be dead and gone as dust in the wind before anyone ever realized “You’ve Been Had, Dad.”

 

The ancient guys knew a date way out in the future would provide them with a livelihood for their lifetime. The modern doomsday prophets are greedy, they want the “fat paycheck now.”

 

The Dumb Young Dudes

 

The modern doomsday guys and gals are counting on the e commerce revenue streams, product endorsements, book sales, talk shows, and news coverage to generate the capital that they can sock into the bank and live off of.

 

Unfortunately, when “Zero Day” arrives, the sun shines and the day naturally wears on – then, the modern, i.e., “young” dumb dudes have to “back pedal” their stories as “End Of An Era” or at the last moment enough people on earth “changed their wicked ways” and global disaster didn’t happen.

 

Around the mid to late 1980s there was the “fear” that earth’s pole might tip too far back or forward and cataclysmic weather would result. It didn’t happen, of course. Some religious nut job types claimed their all night prayer vigil had “saved the world.”

 

Of course, none of the “Planet Savers” came forward with any actual proof like real-time satellite imagery showing the earth tipping slightly forward or back with a time code clicking away in the corner, with a picture in picture inset of the planet savers streaking through the night sky to change earth’s rotational axis.

 

There were no cinema footage of the planet savers on their knees praying while a biological beam of light shoots out of the top of their little heads into the stratosphere to move the clouds and correct glitches in the Van Allen Radiation Belt.

 

The religious soothsayers didn’t even have any video of their group on their knees praying or dancing around naked out in the moonlight.

 

Once again, humanity had to imagine the Planet Savers disrobed and hanging their Lycra leotards and their spandex super suits back in the closet to await the next planetary peril.

 

Earth Heals

 

Planet Earth is a self-healing, living spaceship rotating through space. It is going to take more than some religious nut job doomsday prophets or a civilization thereof of religious nut job doomsday prophets for Planet Earth to “Cash In Her Chips” for the last time.

 

Every few years, some nut job comes along and plays on a basic human fear of humanity.

 

Death,” is a basic human fear.

 

The Big D” causes people to tremble at the thought of it.

 

Mass Extinction Events

 

Mass Extinction” for humanity seems to provide humankind a weird sort of comfort.

 

People usually “fear” “their own mortal death”.

 

People seem to take a weird comfort in the fact that some “event” is going to happen and “End Massive Amounts Of Human Lives At One Time.”

 

People “worry” about the end of the world. It is a “dumb worry.”

 

If God had stamped an “expiration date on Planet Earth” it would be obvious. Satellites in space would photograph the “Heavenly Bar Code” stamped into a mountain and the world would know.

 

If Spaceship Earth was coming apart at the seams, people would realize it because the structural cracks wouldn’t be limited to small areas of the planet.

 

The faults would all open up and spread out the energy around and through the globe and the planet would crumble like a cake.

 

The Universal Earth Engineer did a great interior design that allows Momma Earth to heal from within as well as from without.

 

Now, if a sun, asteroid, meteor, comet, or another planet is closing in on planet Earth; let us hope, NASA, the European Space Agency and the others who have “An Eye On The Sky” are watching.

 

Back Pedal Time

 

Already in the world news, the “Doomsday Predictors” have started to “back pedal” and come up with a reason, i.e., an “excuse” that the world didn’t “explode”, “crack apart like a dropped egg”, or “shimmy apart like the global stock markets.”

 

God, Allah, Yahweh, Jehovah, He, She, Goddess, Zeus, Hera, Diana, Isis, The Man Upstairs, The Woman Upstairs, The Big Super Dude, The Big Super Dudette – God, is a better universal engineer than man.

 

Humankind builds space ships. The Supreme Intellectual Entity Of The Universe builds suns and planets.

 

Never fear, by tomorrow, the “Doomsday Prophets” will have had time to lick their wounds and sleep off their hangovers.

 

By end of business tomorrow – Saturday, December 22, 2012 – there will be another “Doomsday Date” for generations of humanity to grow up in “fear” over.

 

Wait ! Saturday is the weekend !

 

The world will have to wait until Monday for the next Dumb, Dumb Doomsday Date.

 

Monday,December 24, 2012, while they do their “last minute Christmas shopping” – “The Dumb, Dumb Doomsday Dudes” will have another “End Of The World” date ready to generate global paranoid for future generations.

 

The Real World Armageddon Events

 

Apocalypse, Armageddon and the End Of The World usually happens several times a month and people just don’t notice.

 

Typhoons, tornadoes, tsunamis are natural apocalypses that occur as Momma Earth heals and changes herself. The large loss of human life is an apocalypse event.

 

Bomb explosions, large aircraft accidents, where planes “fall out of the sky”, and huge ships that “go down at sea” are all “Acts Of Armageddon.” Whether accidents or terrorism, there is a huge loss of human life, so this is an Armageddon event.

 

The reason why “The Real World Tragic Events” aren’t recognized for the “Apocalypse” and “Armageddon” events that they are is because the major religions of the world “NEED” their “Mass Extinction Event” to keep people coming back to the churches, synagogues and mosques of the world.

 

Otherwise the “Holy Men Of The Planet” would have to get “real jobs” to “earn a living.”

 

History is full of Apocalypse and Armageddon events: World War I, World War II, The San Francisco Earthquake of 1907, ( The New Madrid Earthquake in the 1800s, “when water flowed backwards”) The Bombing Of Pearl Harbor, The Battle Of The Alamo, The World Trade Centers Towers Terrorists Attack. All these events were “Apocalyptic.”

 

The fact that some religion’s hero didn’t show up to “Save The Day” is irrelevant.

 

All of these events were events that resulted in “Mass Extinction Of Human Lives.”

 

Every nation has a history of natural and man made disasters that are “Apocalypse” and “Armageddon” events, since people starting jotting down information for The Maintenance Record Of Planet Earth.

 

If a street corner holy man or holy woman comes up to you with his or her doomsday prophecy, just smile and give him or her some “small sheckles of silver” out of your pocket. Then, he or she can go get their brown bag of cheap wine.

 

Earth Built To Last

 

Earth ain’t going away. It is here to stay.

 

If the internal mechanics of the planets get seriously out of whack, then, it will be obvious.

 

If an external threat from space is en route, then, hopefully, the professional stargazers will reveal it to people in time to come up with a Plan A and a Plan B.

 

Go ahead, put your DVD of “2012” into the DVD player and lean back to watch the movie.

 

Again, Momma Earth is getting bad publicity from the “Doomsday Soothsayers.”By sunrise, some conman or con woman will have come up with another date for Doomsday.

 

Humanity’s Favorite

Doom And Gloom” Story

 

Without Humanity’s Favorite “Doom and Gloom” Story major sections of the global economy would suffer “The Holy Men And Holy Women Of The World Would Have To Get Real Jobs To Earn A Living.”

 

After centuries of parasitic storytelling, “Don’t expect them all to jump up at once to go out and get real ‘elbow grease’ and ‘sweat of the brow’ jobs. They can continue to rest comfortable on their backsides because the old ‘End Of The World Story’ is just “too good” to ever go away.

 

In the “Fear Of The Unknown Column” there is that microscopic fear that one day – “God The Father” – might just of had enough and starts tossing out “The Number 12 Lightning Bolts” right and left.

 

Zap ! Giant man salt shaker ! Zap ! Giant woman salt shaker !

 

Zap ! Zap ! Zap ! Giant Dead Salt Sea !

 

Wait, God has already done those numbers. After 21 Centuries, no doubt, he still has some Nuclear Number 12 Lightning Bolts to wreak out some havoc that has yet to be documented.

 

Is “The Big Boss Man” or “The Big Boss Woman” going to go “Planetary Postal” ?

 

Not likely. Pick up a newspaper and look at the headlines.

 

Another day of terrorism, rape, murder, crime, corruption,war, pain, suffering, hate and general discontent of humanity on planet Earth.

 

After centuries of controversy, conflict, calamity and catastrophe, God knows what to expect from mankind. Not much.

 

He isn’t going to waste time cleansing the world, when people simply need to “Grow Up” and act like evolved individuals.

 

Why should God destroy one of his best life creations just because the spoiled brats of earth don’t know how to play with their toys in the global living rooms of the planet ?”

 

Too Good A Story To Let Go Of

 

Besides, “The End Of The World” is a great story and movie idea. It is too good an idea for citizens of the world to “sluff off.”

 

End Of The World movies always provides a “Genesis” for a new film maker to make a name for himself or herself as a director.

 

End Of The World is always an “In the beginning” at the box office for a movie studios box office receipts.

 

America’s 1970s Cold War End Of The World Nuclear Annihilation movies were like blades of grass because they were everywhere.

 

While one Nuclear Winter End Of The World movie was on the screen in theaters, others were being shot in Hollywood back lots as soon as scripts could be written, actors could be hired and cameras loaded with film.

 

The population of the world could not seem to get enough of “The Global Suicide Story”

 

Four Horsemen Supreme Mythology

 

The Four Horsemen Of The Apocalypse is a timeless classic.

 

All a modern writer or storyteller has to do is change something like use four horse women, put the four heroes or heroines on camels,caribou, motorcycles or use four super human people or four angels.

 

Since some places in the Orient have a hangup on the number “Four” you change the number to 3, 5, 6, 10, 12 or some non-four number.

 

The writer or storyteller puts his or her “spin” on the basic story and you have a comedy, a fantasy, a drama or whatever type of script or manuscript that the writer was going for.

 

Do a really “burn the midnight oil job” on the story and don’t be surprised if the “spinoff” becomes a religion.

 

Fear Of The Unknown

 

The End Of The World is too good a story for Citizens Of The World to ever let go of. The story helps people to face their “Fear Of The Unknown.”

 

You take the basic human “Fear” of “Death” and you put it up on “The Big Screen” in Panavision, Technicolor, surround sound and watch “Poor Old Planet Earth Come Apart For The Umpteenth Time.”

 

A big box of buttered popcorn and a huge soda, in hand, you get to watch the world disappear in your lifetime. You do not have to run and scream into the night as burning chunks of meteors blaze down out of the sky on top of your head.

 

Of course, the “Hercules hero” or the “Athena heroine” is usually suppose to show up in the nick of time to scratch Atlas’ shoulder blade and keep the earth in place in space.

 

No need to fear your death. Death comes when Death comes.

 

We all live; we all die. Life is a natural process.

 

The End Of The World comes for us all.

 

Enjoy your life !

GLOBE THUMBNAIL LOGO ONE

Sam

This work is licensed under a Creative Commons license.

Written by samwarren55

December 21, 2012 at 10:11 PM

Posted in Bloggers, Blogs, Business, Current Events, Ecology, Editorial, Family, God, Holidays, Money, Nature, New Age, Observances, Opinion, Soap Box Religious Opinion, Zera, Zeus

Tagged with , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

“The Exorcist” October Creature Feature

with 12 comments

OCTOBER CREATURE FEATURE

 

THE EXORCIST

 

The film that transformed an obscure Church ritual into a sought after global profession

MV5BNzYwMDA0NTA3M15BMl5BanBnXkFtZTcwMDcwNDY3Mg@@._V1._SX338_SY500__resized

 

by Samuel E. Warren Jr.

 

In my lifetime from October 1955 through mid-December 1973,in the United States, if you needed an “Exorcist”, you would have few real options.

 

You could buy a plane ticket to go to the Vatican and try to convince a priest or the Roman Catholic Church hierarchy.

 

You could try and find someone who knew a root worker or conjurer in New Orleans, Louisiana, who might be willing to help you.

 

You could try and contact someone who had a friend, who lived out in San Francisco, California and was into “The New Age Movement.”

 

If you seriously needed an “Exorcist” before 1973, in the United States, you really had to look under every stone to find one and hope you could find someone who had an understanding priest in the Roman Catholic Church, who would take you seriously enough to actually look for an “exorcist.”

 

The Real Deal Exorcists

 

William Peter Blatty’s 1971 novel, “The Exorcist,” had aspects that were inspired by the actual Exorcism of Roland Doe in Maryland in 1949. Jesuit Priest, Father William S. Bowdern and Father Walter Halloran were the real exorcists.

 

There have been television shows that talked about the original exorcism and one fact all seemed to agree on is the family basically had to beg the church for an exorcism. The practice of exorcisms had become essentially a ritual that had been left in the past.

 

The “resurrected” ritual of exorcism did much not only for The Church, but for all churches. William Friedkin’s film, “The Exorcist” based on Blatty’s novel put God back up on the marquee that got people going back to all kinds of churches, temples, synagogues and mosque because Satan was real again.

 

Rosemary’s Baby” and “The Omen” were child demonic films of the late 1960s and early 1970s that also got people’s attention.

 

What always got me about “The Exorcist” was how such a “normal” little girl could be possessed ?

 

Effective Evil Effects

 

There were no Hollywood Computer Generated Images for movies in the 1970s, production and special effects people had to do create the effects the old fashioned way ‘– “They had to be creative.” Now, people smile at the “pea soup” that gets shot out of Regan’s mouth in the movie, but, it was one of those “Wow” moments in theaters in the 1970s.

 

The fashion sense, or lack there of, of the 1970s does much to make a film look dated, but, the story, the actors, actresses and effects did such a magnificent job Regan MacNeil, the possessed girl, is one of those Halloween characters in the shadow between vampires, mummies, Frankenstein and zombies that no one wants to think about because she just might be “The Real Deal after all.”

 

Face it, no one wants to have to tell their father or mother, “We won’t be coming home for Christmas because your granddaughter is possessed by Satan.”

 

The real fear of The Exorcist movie is that maybe, just maybe, your child could be possessed by Evil. The movie really does turn that parental fear into the worst case scenario by the use of suspense and the creative use of effects. It is little wonder why this movie has become an American Cult Classic.

 

You factor in the notion that you have a veteran priest, who has dealt with and faced Evil at various times and is ready for the battle. Then, you add the young doubting priest to the mix, who believes he is more “a man of science” than “a man of the cloth.” Basically, he let the Church pay for his education, so he could become a successful psychiatrist. Stepping into the ring, Satan has the upper hand and the odds are all in His favor.

 

Temptation Of Teenagers ?

 

Ellen Burstyn, who plays the actress mother, wants the best for her daughter. Linda Blair, who plays Regan Mac Neil, the daughter, is the average All-American Girl for the 1970s.

 

I grew up on a hog farm in the conservative Midwest of the United States of America, known as the Ozarks, right smack dab in “The Bible Belt.” My family, friends and neighbors went to the Baptists and Pentecostal churches. Some crossed the line into Taney County to go to Branson or into Greene County to go to Catholic churches, Lutheran, Methodists and Presbyterians.

 

The preachers and pastors of Stone County, Missouri took their “hellfire and damnation” lessons to heart and knew they were the First Line Of Defense against Satan and His Demonic Legions.

 

Thus, in the Ozarks and the Midwest, you never expected to see Satan walking down the highway or shopping for groceries in the local supermarket. But, in the 1960s or 1970s, if you are writing a story, script or play – how would you get Satan or any of his demons to realistically appear in the literary work ?

 

Demon Dare

 

As decadent and liberal minded as New York City was suppose to be in the 1960s and 1970s; there had to be a way to get Evil into the script and the movie. The All-American Fall Guy – the Ouija Board.

 

In the US, in the 1960s and 1970s, it seemed there were only two real ways for Evil to show up. Teenagers had to figure out some way to do “Satanic Rituals” or go to the store and pretend to be nave enough to buy and use a Ouija Board.

 

In this film, the Ouija Board is the culprit that is “The Three Mile Island” incident that starts demonic radiation leaking into the MacNeil home and poor Regan glows with it.

 

Use of the Ouija Board, helps explain how an East African demon gets through US Customs without a passport and visa. Then, again The Department Of Homeland Security is a story that doesn’t happen until the beginning of the 21st Century.

 

Max von Sydow, who stars in the role of Father Lankester Merrin really does come across as the devout veteran priest, who is ready to stare the demon in the eye and send it back to Hell.

 

Jason Miller as Father Damien Karras does an excellent job as the young priest, who really believes he is a long lost psychiatrist in his soul. One of the story twist is suppose to have the young priest broken up about his mother’s death. I didn’t get the message in 1973 and I haven’t gotten it since.

 

On screen the first time you see the aging, invalid mother, the film mom is sort of already a citizen of “The Twilight Zone” looking to move into “The Outer Limits.” Without more details or a back story to show the mother and son relationship, that story line to me wastes film. I’m a Momma’s Boy, so I’m critical.

 

Actor Titos Vandis, in the role of the young priest’s uncle works with Miller to pull off the story line, but, that is an area where I believe the movie falters and probably gets forgotten about in the overall bouts with the demon. In this movie, the mom character was dead before she was written into the script and she seems just as dead up on the screen.

 

Exorcist Era Excitement

 

This is the movie that “Really Did Start It All.” The obscure term, “exorcist” smoldering in the Vatican archives, “purified” the way for an American religious revival in Catholic and Protestant Churches and created battalions of televangelists and legions of lay (and lame) exorcists throughout the globe.

 

Satanic Seventies ?

 

The ongoing, relentless, never-ending Vietnam War had made young Americans jaded, cynical and skeptical. Grandparents and parents looked at the grandchildren and children and wondered if maybe “alien astronauts” had abducted” and switched their kids because “The Generation Gap” was the real deal.

 

Generations of Americans spoke English to one another in their homes and yet the message was like “A Day At The United Nations Without Translators “ – No one understood ‘nuthin’.

 

America’s politicians in the 1960s were the kind of leaders that people rushed to build statues to. By the 1970s, Americans politicians seemed to be like “used car dealers that you couldn’t get rid of.”

 

The Godfathers

 

America had the traditional movie and sports celebrities of their generation in the early 1970s, but, the “Godfather” movies did “the kinder, gentler dance” for Organized Crime. J. Edgar Hoover had gotten long in the tooth and the organized crime bosses of America had their own brash, public style that had to be the envy of America’s “stale bread politicians of the early 1970s.”

 

While American underworld figures weren’t holding their daily press conferences at their mansions, they were out and about and people couldn’t get enough of their exploits in the streets of America. The irony is the Crime Rate in America was pushing people to believe “Vigilante Justice” might not be such a bad solution as long as you don’t get caught. “Dirty Harry” had become the ideal lawman of America.

 

Nix on Nixon

 

Nixon had no use for the American news media and the American news media had no use for Nixon, other than the political cartoonists, who thrived on daily demonizing his facial features.

 

After Watergate, nothing Nixon said really mattered. The press didn’t seem to believe a word he said and his approval rating with the American public dropped faster than a bad day in the stock market.

 

 

 

Then, of course, Men in America actually got to wear something other than white shirts and black ties. Unfortunately, the Men’s Fashion Scene of the 1970s “overdosed” America’s fashion sense – too much, too soon. Wide ties, wide lapels, bright colors for men’s suits, white belts, white shoes, hounds tooth sport coats thrown into the mix with polyester and wide collars on mien’s shirts. Plus, there was the jogging suits to wear, even if you never intended to go jogging. And denim flared jeans and denim flared bell bottoms were still on the drawing board for the seventies fashion scene.

 

The early 1970s had America’s scurrying like mice on an exercise wheel – they just weren’t sure where they were suppose to be running to.

 

Demonic Days

 

If you look back at 1973, you wonder if someone on Satan’s staff had decided to literally “set the stage” leading up to the release of “The Exorcist.”

 

January 22, 1973 – US Supreme Court rules on Roe versus Wade and overturns states’ bans on abortion.

 

The Vietnam War “Officially Ends” January 27, 1973 with the signing of the Paris Peace Accords. Nixon tries to take credit for the peace agreement. The American news media and many Americans actually see Dr. Henry Kissinger, America’s First Jewish Secretary Of State as the man who got the deal.

 

November 5, 1973, the term, “Shuttle Diplomacy” entered the American culture and described the efforts that Secretary of State Kissinger made in the Middle East at the end of the Yom Kippur War to help keep the region stable.

 

Despite Secretary Kissinger’s hard work to keep the Arab states and Israel living in a somewhat peaceful existence – some religious critics started shouting that Secretary Kissinger could be, “The Anti-Christ.”

 

March 29, 1973, the last United States soldier leaves Vietnam.

 

May 17, 1973, I wear the cap and gown and graduate from Galena High School, Galena, Missouri. It should have been a proud moment for God and Satan. It was a proud moment for me. By June, I was in college at the School Of the Ozarks, Point Lookout, Missouri.,

 

The US bombing of Cambodia ends June 1.

 

July 12, 1973 – The National Archives Fire – The entire 6th floor of the National Personnel Records Center in St. Louis Missouri is destroyed by a fire. Countless US Navy and US Army records are lost, which will affect World War I, World War II, Korean War and Vietnam War military people and their families for generations to come in the area of honorable discharges, military retirement pay and documentation of earned and awarded military decorations.

 

Egyptian and Syrian military forces attack Israel, September 11, 1973, to start the “Yom Kippur War,” in the Sinai Pennisula and the Golan Heights. I am working at KSOZ-FM, to work my way through college. I look through the large plastic window at the huge gray Associated Press teletype thrusting down the keys to announce the start of the War. I’m excited about the story.

 

I rip off the yellow sheet of news copy and hand it to someone in the newsroom. They nod and comment, “Another War in the Middle East.”

 

I understand now, why no one rushed to get it “on air” as breaking news. It was the 1970s, and there was always bad news coming out of the Middle East.

 

I saw the War as a possible start to “Armageddon.” Everyone else in the newsroom just saw it as more bad news from the Middle East to be read after the day’s latest Watergate story.

 

The Yom Kippur War ends October 26, 1973.

 

October 10, 1973, “The Saturday Night Massacre,” Richard Milhouse “Tricky Dick” Nixon fires Special Watergate Prosecutor Archibald Cox and Deputy Attorney General William D. Ruckelshaus.

 

No matter What Nixon did – The Watergate Break-In June 17, 1972 – would not go away and each day’s newspaper brought a new “Watergate” headline in the continuing scandal.

By December 23, 1973, the Organization of Petroleum Exporting Countries, OPEC, had doubled the price of crude oil at the pumps – just in time for “Christmas.”

 

American theaters flip the switch and Warner Brothers “The Exorcist “ flickers on to movie screens December 26, 1973.

 

By November 1979, Iran’s Ayatollah Khomeini labeled “America, The Great Satan: in a speech. Khomeini was the 1970s version of Al Quaeda’s Osama bin Laden.

 

In the early 1960s, Khomeini used his criticism of the Shah of Iran Pahlavi to rise to power among his Muslim followers. The Shah exiled him and he spent more than 14 years in exile between Paris, Turkey and Iraq. Khomeini did not like that the United States Government had close relations with Iran and that the Shah had moved to modernize Iran.

 

When you look back at 1973, it seems like God had gotten dropped off for church bingo and Americans weren’t sure if they were going to pick Him up or hand Him His “Pink Slip.”

 

Satan At The Box Office

 

The film brought in $66.3 million from theaters in the United States and Canada. It currently stands as “The Top Grossing R Rated Film Of All Time.”

 

The Exorcist” movie proved to be the “shakeup” that got God back in His penthouse and kept Him on as the CEO Of Heaven. “The Exorcist” woke up and scared Americans.

 

Before the movie appeared in theaters, many Americans were like Actor Lee J. Cobb in the role of New York City Police Department Detective Lieutenant William F. Kinderman, something is wrong and you just can’t put your finger on it.

 

The approach worked for Cobb’s detective’s role in the movie and outside the theater in the streets of America, “something was wrong and no one knew how to put a finger on it.”

 

The Medical Men

 

Arthur Storch, in the role of the psychiatrist and Barton Haymen as Dr. Samuel Klein are the classic American “Medical Men” of the 1970s, “Of course, Science has an answer for it.” But, when Regan’s condition doesn’t respond to medical treatment, one of the doctors blurts out something about an “exorcist.”

The time devoted to the “Science” and “Medicine”approach in the movie is smart because by the 1970s doctors and scientists had taken to their academic pulpits and “preached” to anyone who would listen that science and medicine would find the cure for all the ills of humanity.

America’s New Prophets

America’s Psychiatrist were on a roll. Sigmund Freud had got them out into the limelight. People seemed hungry for the latest development from the psychiatric world. Hollywood didn’t let the fad pass by; they cranked out movies as fast as they could about doctors and psychiatrist saving the day.

Psychiatrists were America’s New Prophets. It did seem doctors, scientists and psychiatrist had an answer for everything.

The Supernatural” remained the chink in the psychiatrist’s armor. The responses of : “superstition”, “imagination”, and “all in your mind” worked until something happened before your eyes.

Find An Exorcist In The Yellow Pages

Before the movie, your best bet to find an “exorcist” would be to seek permission to search the Vatican archives for a vague reference to an “exorcist.”

After the movie, “Exorcists In America were thicker than hairs on a dog’s back.” At the current rate of growth in a few years America will probably be turning out as many exorcists as we do lawyers and doctors.

No doubt, none of the televangelists of the 1970s and 1980s will ever give “The Exorcist,” “Rosemary’s Baby,” “The Omen,” or any of the other religious horror TV or movie spin-offs an honorable mention, but without “The Hounding Hell Horror Of The Satanic Silver Screen,” some of those preachers would of stayed on cable TV and still be going through the Ozarks trying to arrange “Brush Arbor Revivals” and church pie suppers.

A 21st Century Exorcist ?

Hollywood is silly if they don’t already have plans to do an updated version to compliment, but not compete with the original movie.

A new version could not compete because Linda Blair’s Regan MacNeil character had her unique unspoken, “I’m not going away. . .ever” look, near the end of the movie.

The silly 1970s wardrobe makes “The Exorcist” dated, but, hey, even in the 1970s, “We had to wear clothes.”

Casting Directors – Stellan Skarsgard has earned the right to be Father Merrin in an updated version. In Dominion: Prequel To The Exorcist,” Mr. Skarsgard became the role. In “Exorcist:The Beginning”, he became Father Lankester Merrin, Roman Catholic Archaeologist Priest.

Now, if the Department of Motor Vehicles could just get Mr. Skarsgard ‘s name on his new license right and the Vatican would quit sending him offers for another exorcism overseas.

Darling Demonologists”

In another more contemporary version, it would be nice if the screenwriter could write in a way to bring in a senior ranking demon with more established credentials in religious history, which would allow for even more suspense, special effects and (probably) a bigger budget.

And, since the “Name Of The Game Is Horror”, a senior ranking demon could up the on screen body count to stress the possibility that today’s dog walker shouldn’t count on being tomorrow’s “Darling Demonologist.”

Exorcist 2013 Script Session

Quick, get Warner Brothers on the phone. I’ve got it.

Camera Fade In: Regan’s granddaughter graduates from Oxford and returns to the US to visit “granny.” They are doing the girl, “shoot the breeze” conversation routine. Suddenly, Regan’s youngest granddaughter comes up out of the basement with something in her hands.

You guessed it, America!

Sometimes the old literary devices are the best. All together now, “Ouija Board !”

They chuckle. Of course, granny has had a wonderful life and completely forgot about the initial possession (and probably The Exorcist” spin-off movies after the original).

They open the box, take out the board and begin to play.

Too late “Granny” remembers.

The granddaughter is now “possessed.”

Granny whips out her cell phone hoping that she still has an exorcist priest on speed dial.

The granddaughter does her contortions routine, while the youngest granddaughter jumps up and down screaming.

From here on out. . .it is up to the Hollywood screen writers. You guys and gals run with it. But, go for a demon, who usually gets top billing, with “name recognition.”

800px-Petersdom_von_Engelsburg_gesehen_AB

St. Peter’s Basilica from Castel Sant’Angelo showing the dome rising behind Maderno’s facade. Public Domain Photograph

 

Exorcists Resurrection

The Vatican is now admitting, “Exorcists exist” and is training them. Meanwhile, in the United Kingdom, a group of British school girls seem to be blurring the line between Fact,Faith, Fantasy and Fiction.

Based on the “Darling Demonologists” ages, someone should hand them an old mystic text and point to the section on teenagers,hormones and, “Oh, Look ! Puberty and Poltergeist ?”

Five Star Rating

The Exorcist” is an American Cult Classic, as it should be. Hands down I give it a Five Star Rating and remind viewers it carries an R rating.

For your Halloween viewing this is definitely a movie to watch on All Hollow’s Eve or the night before.

Incidentally, when you swing by Wal-Mart to pick up your Twizler’s and Junior Mints, you might want to make a quick stop at the church to make sure you have a crucifix and rosary beads handy. May, as well pick up a little Holy Water. . .to be safe.

Sam

 

 

Exorcist Information Links

 

Exorcism of Roland Doe

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Exorcism_of_Roland_Doe

Father Walter Halloran

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Walter_Halloran

The Story of a Modern-Day Exorcist

By Gilbert Cruz Monday, Mar. 16, 2009

 

http://www.time.com/time/nation/article/0,8599,1885372,00.html


British School Girls Exorcists

We’re not like normal teenagers’: Meet the exorcist schoolgirls who spend their time casting out DEMONS around the world


http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2024621/Meet-exorcist-schoolgirls-spend-time-casting-demons-worldwide.html

 

 

 

 


This work is licensed under a Creative Commons license.

Written by samwarren55

October 18, 2012 at 7:23 PM

Posted in Bloggers, Blogs, Creature Feature, Editorial, Movies, Opinion

Tagged with , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

God, Satan, Sam Go To The Movies

with 3 comments

October Creature Feature Movie Reviews

God,Satan,Sam

Go To The Movies

MV5BMTcxNTAxMTMzNF5BMl5BanBnXkFtZTcwMjQ1MDAxNA@@._V1._SX640_SY947__resized

by Samuel E. Warren Jr.

God brushes his hand over his new crew cut and flicks the dandruff off the shoulder of his tailored navy blue shiny sharkskin business suit. He rubs his chin and smiles that his five o’clock shadow has yet to appear. He lifts the silver carafe and pours himself a piping hot cup of coffee. He loosens his navy blue tie and unbuttons his shirt collar.

He takes the coffee cup and walks toward the plush white sofa. The expensive chessboard is set up for a game on the table, centered in front of the sofa.

Satan, a handsome man, who sports jet black hair and a cleft chin, strolls to the bar and lifts the glass decanter bottle by the coffee pot.

There is some Benedictine brandy in the short bottle,” offers God.

Satan snickers. “Thanks. I love the warm feeling it gives you gong down, but, the Benedictine monks and I never seem to see eye to eye.”

Satan’s Big Date

Satan adjusts his starched French cuffs and glances at his cuff links. He looks into the large wall mirror and briefly fidgets with his bow tie. To a mere mortal, the man in the expensive tuxedo would seem to be a successful bodybuilder.

Big date,” asks God ?

Working,” grins Satan. “It’s Wednesday. It is ‘Hump Day’” for the mortals. You know, the middle of the work week. They are over the ‘hump” and on a down hill slide to the weekend. Fro me, this is a great time to hit the bars and cause the mortals to do silly things like drink too much at the bar.”

God rises and walks up to the bar to get the coffee pot and cups on the silver tray. “Surely, you have time for a quick chess game before you have to put your ‘hooves’ to the grindstone,” teases God.

Satan laughs and sips his whiskey. “You are one of a kind –”

— Thank you,” God interrupts.

It wasn’t a compliment,” snickers Satan.

God shrugs and grins.

Satan picks up the crystal whiskey decanter and walks toward the sofa. “I have the whole planet coming apart at the seems and you want to play a chess game.”

God steps behind the bar, kneels down and opens the small refrigerator. “Bless her heart. My wife, Zera, she is a jewel.” He reaches in and takes out the silver platter of prepared sandwiches.

God and Satan Shoot The Breeze

This is a great hotel. As efficient as their housekeeping staff is they don’t take the love and time to make sandwiches as scrumptious as what Zera makes.” God smiles broadly and places the tray of sandwiches on the coffee table, in front of the chess table.

I can see it on your face, Satan. You are thinking if I am such a happily married God what am I doing hanging out in a hotel room. It is the whole October, Halloween, time of year. I get in my part The Veil Between The World mode and start to wonder if maybe sometime I shouldn’t just do a little more tweaking and allow some celestial events to move ahead of schedule.

Zera reminds me the physical laws of the universe are there for a reason. She’s right, of course. Still, around Halloween, I get in my “What If” mode. So, sometimes this time of year, I show up in The Real World or another realm for a few days to just chill out and get a fresh perspective on things. Who would think centuries of working in the universe could be so demanding and taxing on your life force ?

Satan pours himself another drink and smiles.

Let me see, if I’m getting this right. You. God Almighty. Creator of the Universe. What, after umpteen centuries, you decide to have a mid-life crisis ?

And, hello. You represent all the goody goody stuff of the universe. You call me, Satan, Lord Of The Underworld ? Where did you ever get the idea that we should hang out together?”

God grins. “You are so full of yourself sometimes. I ain’t asking you to help me throw a birthday party. I’m just saying in the Immortal Entity Realm, it is not like we have tons and tons of relatives and family members to hang out with.”

True,” grumbles Satan.

Sometimes it is just nice to talk to another Immortal Entity. It is not like we are going to go deer hunting together and we aren’t going to go float fishing in The Real World. I just wanted to ‘Shoot The Breeze’ with you.

By the way, help yourself to some sandwiches. Tuna. Egg. Ham salad. Chicken salad. Ham. Roast beef. Hero sandwiches. Club sandwiches. There is even, some baloney and cheese sandwiches. Zera is a wonderful cook.”

What know peanut butter and jelly sandwiches,”Satan sneers.

Satan’s Marital Problems

You’re just jealous,” teases God. “Lilith would do right by you, if you ever paid attention to her.”

Lilith ! Do right by me ! You are unreal ! I am The Prince Of Darkness ! I am The Lord Of Evil ! I am the Embodiment Of All Things Bad In The Universe –”

— How is that working out for you anyway,” teases God, interrupting Satan’s diatribe ?

You think, what I send her roses and suddenly The Queen Of Evil is going to get misty eyed and want to have a romantic dinner.”

It works for Me, the angels and the mortals. You should try it,” grins God, reaching for a sandwich and leaning back on the sofa.

Satan pours himself another whiskey. “I told you I have the planet coming apart at the seams. You didn’t hear me.”

I heard you,” smiles God. “I chose to ignore you. You forget, I win. Pick the game, time and again, I always win. You always “Overthink” everything. You are the ‘Supreme Control Freak.”

God and Satan Talk Politics

After eons, millennium and centuries, you still haven’t figured out, I beat you the instant I gave the mortals “Freewill.” They get to make their own choices; right or wrong. That is why they always beat you, Satan.

You, Satan, keep doing the Hitler, Hirohito, Saddam Hussein, Idi Amin, Mommar Gadhafi, Osama bin Laden, crazy man, nut job, dictator, call the shots routine and you still don’t realize that “Freewill” is the “Hope” and “Faith” that humanity always hangs it’s hat on,” elaborates God.

Maybe,” grumbles Satan, who grins, “I have an Ace in the hole.”

You have the American Presidential Elections in November. Big deal. If I looked at it closely, I might be worried. You are getting better at getting close to politicians and making deals with them. You learned a lot in “The Cold War,” Satan.” God grins and puts his feet up on the coffee table.

The Cold War,” “The Domino Theory,” the whole “A-Bomb Scare” and “Doomsday Paranoia,” I do have to give you credit. The whole global propaganda and paranoia is, indeed, a stroke of genius. You know how to make people scared of their shadows. But, you forget, people still “think” for themselves. Mussolini ended up on a meat hook and Gadhafi, in the frozen food section, of a freezer.

Americans are always skeptical and cynical of their politicians. They will vote in November. And, they will get what they deserve. The Americans need their election process just like the British need their royal family. Politics in Asia, keeps changing even faster than you can keep up with it, Satan. The global financial crisis has got everyone wide awake. They just aren’t sure what to do next.”

God and Satan Talk Finances

Satan grins. “Money.”

Try one of the sandwiches,” God offers. “Zera makes a great egg sandwich. You will have to get your own catsup, mustard and relish. I left it in the ice box.”

Satan sits down on the sofa and picks up a chicken salad sandwich. “I do my thing in the global financial markets and you are done for,” threatens Satan.

Do I look worried,” smiles God. “You don’t know a Bull or Bear Market from your own zodiac sign. For eons, you have been trying to understand Capitalism and Free Enterprise and then, you, wimp out, and resort to bank robbers, terrorists and tempting accountants. Face it, Satan. You are a small picture, guy. You never go for The Big Picture. You are to into instant gratification.”

God stands up and picks up the receiver on the telephone. “Time to call room service. I’m thinking a big, juicy hamburger that it takes to hands to hold. French fries. Make that three burgers. It was a long day and I have an appetite. What about you ? There is a menu there. This hotel has some great foot long hot dogs.”

Hump Day

Satan finishes his sandwich and rises. “Nah.” He glances at his expensive wristwatch. “I’ve gpt to get on the job.”

God laughs. “Chill. It is only 6 p.m. You know, the party people don’t hit the clubs until 8, 9 or 10 at the earliest. Right now, the people in the bars are the guys who are blowing off the day

The old, It was a rough day. Their boss is a bum. Someone else got the promotion. And, of course, the, “Thank God, It Is Hump Day” crowd, who are ready to write off the rest of the week. This early in the evening, people are just crying in their beer.

It is still too early to pick on the church types, who have their Wednesday evening services because they are doing choir practices and the young people are doing their youth ministry and testimonial work.”

God’s Chess Game ?

God orders the hamburgers and hangs up the phone. He nods at the chess board. Satan shakes his head No.

Get over, JOB,” God smiles.

That was eons ago. You were still a newbie to the whole Lord Of Darkness occupation. Job worked for a living, so when you made him the “World Is Yours”, you have just won the Powerball of the Universe lottery; he knew it was a scam. He had a hard life and nothing came easy. Come on, one chess game. You have plenty of time. It is not like, you or I punch a clock.”

Satan frowns and sits on the sofa. He picks up the black rook and turns it in his manicured fingers. “I get to be white,” he challenges.

Fine. You get to be white,” acknowledges God.

Satan scowls and puts the piece on the board. He stands up and puts his hands on his hips.

Something else,” mumbles Satan. “Let’s do something else other than chess.”

Satan’s Ouija Board

God grins. “You don’t like board games. Other than the Ouija Board – and, you cheat at it.”

Satan smiles. “I’m a bad boy. What can I say?”

We can’t discuss politics and religion. In politics, you get mad and always toss a politician, out in front of the media to be exposed, or try to set the person up to be harmed. We talk religion and the next thing, I catch you trying to set up racial profiling and influencing public policies on women’s rights and gender issues.”

God smirks. “Honest. Satan, you are too transparent. I see you coming a mile away. If mortals paid attention, they would notice you have the covert skills of a drunk elephant.”

Satan waves off the remark. “Fine ! I don’t want to do chess. We never agree in out discussion on politics and religion. So, what do we do ?”

God and Satan Choose Movies

God picks up the remote and points it at the huge wide screen TV. “Cable, satellite, CDs, DVDs, VCRs; you decide ?”

No one watches VCR tapes anymore,” grumbles Satan.

You’re kidding. I have a whole room of VCR tapes. But, I do have a few angels, who are transferring them to CDs and DVDs. My eight track tapes and cassette tapes still work great for music. But, it is getting harder to find parts for the machine,” observes God.

Satan shakes his head. “Just click the remote. Let’s watch the news.”

God shakes his head No. “I know you. You get too upset watching the news. Besides, you always put your two cents in and I can never hear the report.”

God stands up and waves his hand. The wall on the right opens and shelves from the floor to the ceiling appear with movie DVDs.

I’m not picking the movie,” protested Satan. “The combined television episodes and movies of the world. It would take me decades to find a movie. Besides we never agree on what to watch.”

Send Out For Sam

God smirks and waves his hand. A man appears in a polo shirt, walking shorts and flip flop sandals.

Satan, I believe you know Sam.”

Sam,” God nods and smiles. I stand and nod at God and Satan. “Forgive my appearance. I wasn’t expecting company.”

God laughs. “I’m sure I can put you at ease.” He gestures and I stand comfortable in a stylish three piece dark blue suit. God points at the collar. “Not too tight ?”

No sir, “ I answer. I notice the tie in the reflection on the wall. “Nice Windsor knot.”

Thank you,” God answers.

Satan shakes his head. “All the movie critics of the world at your beck and call, You blink your eye and poof, here is a top notch Hollywood or Sundance movie critic.” Satan points at me.

You get this guy. What’s his credentials? What he has been watching movies since he was big enough to turn on the TV?”

Actually, yes sir. I have been watching TV and movies and paying attention to them most of my life,” I answer.

Satan scowls. “Rhetorical. Human. I’m thinking God is messing with my head. Is it okay, with you, human, if I yank the Creator of the Universe’s chain?”

God laughs. “Satan, he gets in the modes, Sam. Between us, I think, he’s probably jealous of his wife, Li;ith. Plus, I get the feeling that he is probably just a tad guilty about the way he’s been treating her. You know, he gets so wrapped up in his Universal bad guy image. Sometimes, he takes work home with him.”

Sam The Movie Critic

Satan shakes his head. “Ha. Ha. Let’s all have a good laugh at Satan’s expense. Now, then, please answer my question. Why this guy ? An American blog writer in the Philippines. This is the guy, You, God Almighty, Creator Of The Universe, pick to find a movie for you. Why ?”

God laughs. “It is October. Sam has been burning the midnight oil to write movie reviews for Halloween. He does it for his readers; why wouldn’t he recommend a movie to The Forces Of The Universe ?”

Satan scowls and looks at me. Then, he smiles. “I do know you. You really loved to party down in the 1970, 1980s and 1990s.”

I still do, sir.” I answer and smile.

Satan grins and walks back to the sofa. God leans back on the sofa.

Amaze us, mortal,” challenges Satan. “Just a moment,” he cautions and gestures.

The room automatically transforms into a classic theatre. I stand on stage. The plush sofa is the front row seats. The long heavy curtains and the large silver screen identifies the room as a theater.

Satan,” God frowns and points at the flames leaping up around the edges of the stage.

Satan sneers. “Mortals, at least, some, think you have a sense of humor.”

I do,” smiles God. “I just don’t always appreciate your sense of heating and air conditioning.”

Say it again, Sam,” teases Satan.

Gentlemen, since I am here, obviously, you aren’t looking at the recommendations of contemporary movie critics. I grew up in Missouri and Missouri boy, Walt Disney became famous for his cartoons and family entertainment movies. If you wanted a Disney flick or a G rated family movie, you wouldn’t call me.”

God nods. Satan snickers.

Satan, you know I don’t do “romantic comedies,” I appreciate animated movies, but not anime, so that genre is out.”

God grins. The theater curtains part and action and sci-fi movie clips transition quickly across the screen in the background.

God, sir, you know, I love action movies, mysteries and science fiction. Since you made reference to my ‘Sam I Am Blog” I know that you are aware that I have been writing movie reviews for October and Halloween.”

Satan, obviously, you remember horror flicks that I have forgot.”

Decades of them, no doubt,” he grins.

Suddenly, in the background, on the silver screen behind me a plethora of horror movie clips flash across the screen.

My guess would be, God, doesn’t mind watching a horror flick now and then. But, if you pick the movies, Satan, sir.” I shrug. “God would probably have to watch all the “Saw” movies, “Jeepers,” and then, the two of you would debate on watching the “Halloween”MV5BNjkwMjcxNDc0MV5BMl5BanBnXkFtZTYwOTYxMzQ3._V1._SY317_CR0,0,214,317_ series, the “Friday the 13th” series, as well as probably the “A Nightmare On Elm Street” series. Plus, I would imagine, Satan would go for “Texas Chainsaw Massacre.” MV5BMTIwNjQ2MzUyMF5BMl5BanBnXkFtZTYwMTMyNjk4._V1._SX263_SY475__resized 

Satan looks at God. “Sam loves his exposition; doesn’t he ?”

He is in the moment,” smiles God. “Let him run with it.”

Satan leans forward on the edge of the sofa. “The envelope, please ?”

God laughs. “Ignore him. He has no patience. I keep telling him to cut back on his daily kerosene intake.”

I want to watch a Halloween movie before Halloween,” protests Satan.

The Rite,” a great movie. Sir Anthony Hopkins plays a priest. “The Order,” not the Jean Claude Van Damme action flick set in the Holy Land, but the Heath Ledger movie.

The Order

MV5BOTk5NDA5MzAzNV5BMl5BanBnXkFtZTYwNDk3Njk5._V1._SX337_SY500__resized

The Order.” A great story, where Ledger plays a young priest. Three cheers to the actor that plays the “Sin Eater.” You really don’t see the “Sin Eater” in a lot of contemporary Hollywood movies. That is a shame. A Sin Eater can be every bit as interesting as a vampire and a lot more interesting than the old “Let Me Eat Your Brains Zombies.”

God laughs. Satan raises a finger. “Are we getting to the point sometime in October.”

I smile. “Yes, sir. Thank you, sir. Today is Wednesday, on earth, anyway. With your permission, I’ll give you a creature feature for Wednesday, Thursday and Friday –”

— What no Saturday input, “ snickers Satan,

Fine, Sam,” smiles God.

Wednesday. The Order. Heath Ledger does a wonderful job of playing a young man caught between Heaven and Hell. The fact he portrays a priest points out how hard it is to live in The Real World and try to live by the Old Rules of religious dogma.”

I look at Satan. “My guess is you, sir, inspired the writer to create the Dark Priest in this story.”

Satan grins, “Don’t ask. Don’t tell.”

Satan leans forward. “I’m curious. What is it about this film that makes it so memorable to you ?

Heaven and Hell. Good versus Evil. The story is a flip of the coin because you are never sure who is going to choose, which path. The sin eater really confuses the overall story because it is hard to decide if he is a good guy or a bad guy. And I kept guessing to the end, which way the young priest would go.

The Order, may not be a blockbuster that raked in the dough, but I suspect it will become a cult classic because it has all those issues of youth, choosing a path and the conflict of ‘Damn If You Do And Damn If You Don’t.’”

Satan nods and leans back against the sofa. He looks at God. “Okay. So, sometimes Sam surprises even me. I figured he would comment on the photography and special effects.”

The Prophecy

MV5BMTI1NDczMzk4OF5BMl5BanBnXkFtZTYwMzE1MTM5._V1._SX260_SY475__resized

Thursday, I would recommend, “The Prophecy.” Actor Christopher Walken is scary as an archangel. This is another of those stories that makes mortals feel like they are always caught in the crosshairs of a shooting match between God and Satan.”

Monkeys,” laughs Satan. “If it is the movie, I think it is, Walken as the angry archangel always criticizes humans and calls them “monkeys.”

Some actors really seem to become the roles they play. I could believe Christopher Walken as an archangel. But, after watching this movie, if Christopher Walken was an archangel – I would be one mortal that would never upset him,” I admit.

I nod at Satan. “In some movies, sir, you are always portrayed as a creature that wipes out everything in the path and could careless about the results. In this movie, the actor that portrays you allows you to come off like a serious businessman, who realizes he has to pick and choose his battles. The Prince Of Darkness is portrayed as a serious and intelligent entity, who has a plan to rise above his station in the Universe.”

Satan grins, “Touche.”

Friday ?” God smiles.

Constantine

MV5BMTE5NDk5NTUyN15BMl5BanBnXkFtZTYwNzUyMDA3._V1._SX485_SY720__resized

Constantine, sir. A great Keanu Reeves film. I love the gold ‘God Gun” in the movie. It is creative to put a round cylinder on a cross and blow away the bad guys.”

MV5BMjE5OTEwNDI2NF5BMl5BanBnXkFtZTcwMzExOTI3MQ@@._V1._SX380_SY500__resizedFire power,” snickers Satan !

True,” Sam admits. “The story is awesome. The exorcist is in bad need of a vacation. He is ready to toss in the towel on his place in the never ending battle of Good and Evil.”

The Woman

The woman,” sighs Satan. “There is always a woman.” Satan smiles and gestures. He is transformed into an attractive big, beautiful, buxom, blonde woman in an low cut, strapless V neck red evening gown. The massive diamond necklace and matching earrings glow.

God shakes his head. “Satan, sometimes you are a real ‘Drama Queen.”

Satan strolls over to me and leans up against my shoulder. “There is a woman in this film.”

Yes, sir. . .er. . .mam.”

Rachel Weisz plays a dual role as a detective and a victim. She is crucial in getting Keanu Reeves as the exorcist to move forward to help her to solve the case at hand and battle half demons and half angels in the process.”

Satan in the guise of a wealthy woman continues to act in the role of a seductress and moves around me. “Why would I want to watch a film where the hero and heroine is sending demons back to Hell ? ”

They do it in style,” I answer. Keanu Reeves is wonderful in the role of the exorcist. He knows what need to be done. He is just fed up with the whole Good versus Evil contest. But, when the time comes for the rubber to meet the road. He acts. He is a man on a mission. So determined that nothing in Heaven or Hell is going to stop him. In the movie, he goes literally, “straight to Hell.”

MV5BMjEzMjUxNzA4NF5BMl5BanBnXkFtZTcwNTY1ODkyMQ@@._V1._SX409_SY500__resized

The graphics of being in Hell is intense. You will unbutton your shirt collar and get up to get a glass of water. The hell graphic is so intense, you wonder why your TV isn’t melting.

There is a scene where Rachel Weisz has to lie in a bathtub of water. I found it intense. Anytime someone is under water and doesn’t appear to be breathing, then, you want to gasp for air or rise to the surface. The story needs to hold you under to make a point. The movie makes the point.

I step back and nod respectfully at Satan, “Well, sir. The actor, who portrays you, Peter Stormare, does so in a manner that makes you seem a skilled diplomat. He is dressed in a stylish white suit, which means Lucifer , a.ka., the devil, a.k.a, Satan does not always have to wear black.

And, in the “Constantine” movie’s Lucifer has his own style, which means that even though Lucifer is immaculately dressed, he is barefoot.

Who but The Prince Of Darkness would dress to the nines and then go barefoot?”

Satan nods and changes back to the man in the tuxedo. “It is nice when mortals portray me as a man with a plan rather than some kind of loose cannon kill crazy psycho.”

With respect, gentlemen there you have it. Wednesday, The Order with Heath Ledger. Thursday, The Prophecy with Christopher Walken. Friday, Constantine with Keanu Reeves.”

God nods and the table, in front of the sofa, fills with two buckets of popcorn, two large drinks and an assortment of candy bars. God raises his hand and The Order DVD materializes in his hand.

Sam, would you like to join us for an evening at the movies,” asks God.

I would love to, sir. But, I really need to work on another creature feature movie review article for Halloween to post for my blog readers.”

Understood,” he smiles.

God raises his hand. The large red theater curtains part to reveal the huge silver screen. God snaps his fingers and the light above flickers as the opening attractions appear on screen.

God looks at me. “If you are ready ? I’ll send you back.”

Yes, sir. Thank you.” God raises his hand.

Wait ! Before you send Sam back. Saturday,” Satan exclaims.

Sir,” I ask ?

Not that I would have time to waste on some movie on Saturday,” Satan explains.

Saturday is one of my busy days. Come Saturday, I am always on the move. But, just for the sake of discussion, if I did want to see a creature feature on Saturday what would you suggest ?”

Sir, there are plenty of vampire, zombies and monster movies for creature features that you could choose for Saturday,” I reply.

Satan nods. “Okay. Okay. Okay. But, if we stick for awhile longer with demons as creatures, off the top of your head, what movie comes to mind.”

A Devil’s Advocate

MV5BMTcyMzI3NDM4Nl5BMl5BanBnXkFtZTcwMTUxOTYzNA@@._V1._SX336_SY500__resized

I smile, “A Devil’s Advocate.”

A Devil’s Advocate,” Satan repeats the name with a smile.

Satan looks at God, “I hate to admit it. As mortals go, I find myself sometimes thinking Sam, here, isn’t such a bad guy for a mortal.

Hang on a second. Mouthpiece. Shyster. Those are words for lawyers. The phrase, “Philadelphia lawyer,” is a phrase for lawyer. Umm, devil’s advocate, as I recall is a phrase for lawyers.”

Satan frowns at me. “I ask for a horror movie and you give me a lawyer movie.”

Satan frowns at me and straightens out his arm to point at God without looking. “Mr. Creator Of The Universe, over there, is the one with a sense of humor. I don’t have a sense of humor. I’m the guy people say who has a short fuse. I am legendary for getting hot under the collar. Tell me, Sam, we are on the same page, here.”

I nod, “Yes,sir. A Devil’s Advocate is a horror flick.”

Satan steps back and looks at me. “Horror flick,” he reminds me.

Yes, sir. It is a horror flick. It is about lawyers,” I smile.

In America, lawyers are usually thought to be creatures. Therefore, the lawyers as creatures meets my criteria for creature feature. Some of us, Americans, even think of lawyers more as demons than humans.”

Sir, as Satan, The Legendary Prince Of Darkness, I would imagine that you could appreciate this movie. First, in this movie, in The Real World, you are a senior partner of a law firm. Your firm is making money hand over fist. You have the best of all worlds and no one can stop you in the Real World because all the talented and smart lawyers work for your firm.

Keanu Reeves and Charlize Theron are the lawyer and his young wife, who are rocketing to stardom through the American legal system. There are numerous twist and turns throughout the movie.

What Charlton Heston did for Moses and The Ten Commandments, Al Pacino does for Satan in the role of John Milton, a lawyer, in A Devil’s Advocate.

Satan, the devil, arrives on screen larger than life. He is an outgoing, vivacious, person who never apologizes for being and acting human. It is obvious, the devil enjoys the weaknesses of being human. The irony is you can be bad and have the good life.”

Satan grins. “Sam, do I detect a note of admiration and respect in your voice.”

Yes, sir. Daddy is a Texan. I was taught Southern hospitality. Momma is a hillbilly, who always demanded I ‘respect’ my elders. I’m in my 50s, but, I know that you and God are much older than I, so, sir, I have to respect my elders and you, gentlemen, are my elders.”

Admiration,” teases Satan. “This movie makes you admire me; doesn’t it ?”

Not admire, sir. Understand. The movie points out that while it is really easy for humanity to choose the easy way and the negative choices; it is wiser to follow the longer road to positive choices. In this movie, Satan is humanized because he understands the fears and the needs of people.”

Satan grins. “You enjoyed the payback in the movie. You like it when the bad guys get what is coming to them.”

Always, sir.”

I look at God, “With all due respect, sir, I have never been a ‘turn the other cheek kind of guy.’ No offense.”

No offense taken, Sam. Remember, I still have my Old Testament moments, even today.” God smiles.

God raises his hand to send me back.

Wait !” Satan points at me. “I don’t want you to spoil the ending of this movie for me, but, I sense you really do enjoy this movie. You have admitted that you like watching the bad guys get what is coming to them.

I sense you like the special effects of the film. It is obvious you like the story overall. But, I’m still getting a feeling that you think this is one of those movies that brings it all together.”

I nod.

Don’t ruin the ending for me, but what brings this movie all together.”

I laugh. “The reporter ?”

Reporter ? What reporter,” ask Satan ?

I grin. “ Ask my wife. Ask my cousin, Donna. Ask any of my family and friends and they will tell you, I considered it my life’s calling to be a reporter. I love being a reporter. Being a reporter, is all I ever really wanted to do in life. Being a reporter, is my “dream job.”

I love it in a movie, when the reporter triumphs over all the odds. I could relate to the reporter in the movie. In this movie, the lawyers all do their own thing. They choose their Heaven and Hell. The smart guy is the reporter.”

Satan shrugs, “What reporter ?”

God laughs. “Watch the movie.”

I nod at the Junior mints box on the table. “May I ?” God nods. “Go ahead, Sam.”

I pick up the box of Junior Mints and step back to be sent back to The Real World.

Satan grimaces, “What reporter ?”

I smile. “The reporter in the movie brings the story around from the beginning to the end. He gets the last word.”

I feel the phase procedure begin. I wave at God and Satan sitting on the sofa, in front of the theater stage. God smiles and nods.

The Legendary Forces Of The Universe begin to become a distant blur, in front of my eyes. I feel my body begin to move back through Time and Space to The Real World,

In the distance, I hear Satan mumble, “What reporter ?”

Sam

 

Death Grief – A Personal Issue

with 17 comments

Death Grief

A Personal Issue

by Samuel E. Warren Jr.

“Wishing A Loved One Back To Life Does Not Work – I Tried It.” When my mother died, I tried everything I could think of to understand, “Why ?” Obviously, Death is a natural end of Life, but, when personal tragedy arrives – logic is of little use. Peace Of Mind is an “emotional state” that has to be recognized and satisfied in order for Life to have any real meaning. I had to deal with my grief by trying to discover “What I Truly Believed About An Afterlife.” Photo by Samuel E. Warren Jr.

When a close loved one dies, family and friends try to help your emotional state of mind. It is nice that they try. It is nice that they offer advice. But, the truth is, we are all individual and unique.

While our bodies have the basic physical and chemical structure from person to person; it is in our minds that we are all truly unique. In our minds, despite what Sigmund Freud and his legions of psychiatrists and psychologists promote – we are unique. Culture, society, civilization may try to hardwire a certain perspective into our heads, but, the individual can “decide” to “buy” or reject the information or the fairy tale.

As humans, we learn “how-to-play-the-game” and we learn when it is important to “pay lip service” to popular ideas of our society, culture and civilizations. At the end of the day, “We are always ‘Free In Our Minds To Choose What We Believe.’”

When my mother died, family and friends were polite and expressed their sympathy. I did truly appreciate the gesture. Having grown up in the midwest, in the Ozarks, family and friends naturally “assumed” I believed as they did in the overall area of religion. They were wrong.

I believe in God.

But, I have never really believed in the “Traditional Christian God,” because after the Old Testament, the Traditional Christian God becomes an “Eternal Couch Potato Looking At The Big Screen TV Of The Universe And Not Getting Involved.”

Anytime I think of God, I put him “on the ground, in country, in the thick of the action, working alongside me, or on my behalf to solve problems. If He or She has to move back and forth between Heaven and the Real World, that is no problem and no big deal. After all, Creator Of The Universe, then, the whole Space and Time issues are irrelevant.

At my mother’s death, the whole issue of grief became apparent. While the Real World issues of Funeral and Burial Arrangements are at the forefront of your mind, your personal emotions are inside your head leaking radioactivity like a busted Three Mile Island nuclear reactor.

While people will offer you the traditional religious cliches of life, no one seems willing to help you with an in-depth soul search. Of course, you will find those “Soul Savers” in the society – “God’s Used Car Salesmen,” who regardless or the time of day or circumstance, these people appear out of nowhere and give you their “Save Your Soul” spiel; but, they don’t answer questions. If you start to ask questions that deviates from their scripted testimony, then, they get upset or back away and leave.

You can ask friends and family about their religious views, but, you have to approach the subject as though you are asking about the weather – in a light-hearted conversational fashion.

Personal Quest

Thus, if you try to work through personal grief using religion, then, it will be a personal quest. There is no way to know, where that quest will take you.

You just have to make the decision to want to find answers.

I have always had an open mind on religion.

Thus, I pulled out all the stops. No idea was too “off the wall’, “far out” or “really out there to consider” because the traditional ideas always seemed to raise more questions than they answer.

Thus, I pulled out my collection of various books, magazines and surfed the Internet looking for information on religion, the supernatural and the Afterlife. My solution to the grief is I had to create an Afterlife commanded by the Gods and Goddesses that I could relate to and identify with.

Naturally, each individual will have to come up with their own solution to the grief surrounding the Death and personal loss of a loved one. I could not endure society’s “Supermarket Religions” of processed and packaged prophets. Nor, would I endure the “psychobabble” of professional experts who justify their “mental guesswork” with society’s agreed upon “sheepskin credentials.”

Alas, Sigmund and the boys may just be well-dressed soothsayers dancing in the light of the moon after all. If you are curious, about my “Serious Soul Search,” then, visit my “Samuel Warren The Writer” blog and read my article: “Momma’s Death – Required My Own Afterlife Solution” or use the link to take you there: http://www.samuelwarrenthewriter.blogspot.com/2012/06/mommas-death-required-my-own-afterlife.html

I appreciate feedback from readers, so, please, feel free to leave a comment on that blog or to return to my “Sam I Am Blog” and post your comment.

“The True Magick Of Life” is sometimes that forgotten lamp hidden on a back shelf of your mind, labeled, “Imagination.” Creativity and imagination maybe methods you can use to help you work through personal grief. Tools of The Real World can sometimes “spark” your mind to find a solution. Photo by Samuel E. Warren Jr.

Thank you,

Sam

%d bloggers like this: